2nd chances, 2nd choices
by Sirena
Summary: This is a story about the daughter we never met, and the love we never thought was there, please r/r
1. Prologue: Waking Up

Disclaimer: Severus Snape belongs to J. K. Rowling

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2nd Chances, 2nd Choices: Prologue 

Severus Snape sat up in bed drenched in a cold sweat. He pressed his hands to his eyes in a desperate attempt to block out the haunting vision that had come to him in his sleep. This vision deeply troubled Severus because he almost never dreamt. Usually his sleep was accompanied by swirls of gray mist, or a high pitched voice reciting the thousands of formulas for all the potions that he knew. 

Only twice before had he dreamed a true dream, a vision and they had both been the same. Just as the one that he just awoken him was the same. Always the same dream, and always with the same event to follow. Though he had only seen it twice before Severus knew every detail of this dream. 

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The damp air, the thin light of many candles and the soft scent of Freesia circulating through his senses as he stood, alone. But then he was not alone, a figure stood before his clad in a dark, hooded cape. Suddenly Severus could feel shivers all along his back, shoulders, and arms. He stood stock still, not daring to move. Slowly the figure advanced on him, right hand outstretched. Severus felt fear pulsing through every nerve in his body, yet still he did not move. Now the figure was but a foot from him and the right hand reached out and grasped his left arm, not forcefully, but steadily. The hand ran down the length of his arm till it rested on the back of his wrist and it slowly drew his hand up till it stretched across the distance between them. The figure brought its other hand up and pushed the sleeve of Severus's robe back past his elbow revealing that shameful mark that daunted him every day of his life. At this point he always felt the urge to draw away and conceal the snake and skull, something about this figure made him feel so belittled and ashamed. Not that he wasn't ashamed of what he'd done, but with this figure, for what ever reason he felt like only half a person, because somewhere inside him he knew, that this figure was the one who would ever truly forgive him for his many crimes. But he did not draw back and both of the figure's hands began to examine his mark and as they did he felt a radiating warmth and comfort. But then he worked up the courage to look the figure in the face, for a moment he saw two flecks of piercing blue, then all went dark and he awoke in his own bed.

Throwing off his covers Severus got out of bed and went through the door to his office. He did not bother to turn on a light, he knew what he was looking for and he did not require his eyes to examine it. Sitting at his desk he bent and opened the bottom drawer. He let his fingers slide along the side of the cabinet till he found what he was looking for. A hole in the side of the wood that he had covered with tape many years before. 

Swiftly he pulled the tape aside and felt inside the hole. Sure enough it was still there and he drew out the little velvet bag before pushing the drawer closed again. He carried the little bag back to his room and sat on the edge of his bed to examine its contents. He emptied the contents out over the comforter, a scrap of hunter green velvet, a dark red curl, and a white gold ring with a perfect, uncut ruby in the center surrounded by a diamond carat on each side. 

First he ran his fingers along the scrap of velvet, remembering when he had run his hands down the length of the scrap's origin. Next he turned to the curl, this he brought to his face and let rest on his check. Like the other two items in the pouch it still carried the faint fragrance of freesia. 

Lastly he picked up the ring; Severus turned it over and over in his fingers before closing his fingers around it to form a fist. Suddenly he was possessed by a fit of bitter tears. Bringing his fists up to his eyes in a feeble attempt to stop the flow he felt the stones of the ring cutting into his palm and he knew two things, his vision would return, and it would ruin hi, again.

Author's note:

This is my first fan fic, so what do you guys think, any good? Any ideas? Opinions and ideas welcome 


	2. One Man's Favor, Another's Fear

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One Man's Favor, Another's Fear

Since the news of Voldemort's return had gotten out countless numbers of people had flown in and out of Hogwarts to speak with its headmaster, Professor Dumbldore. So when Severus heard his students whispering right before class was over, as they were cleaning up that some very important guests were expected today he paid it no mind. "Just another batch of those stuffy foreign ambassadors of good will, oh goody! Now I'll have to sit through another of those boring as hell banquets where you can't understand half the things the people are saying because to communicate from one person to the other took five extra people because they all speak only one language and none are the same." 

Flopping down in the chair behind his desk he placed his head in his hands, raised his eyes to the ceiling and hissed with mock enthusiasm, "well I guess it's just another fun filled day at Hogwarts!" But aside from all that he was still troubled by his vision. How could this person be coming back, when Severus was sure that he'd done a pretty thorough job of banishing this person from his life. It had been almost twenty years since that fateful day. The day when he had managed to alienate the only person who had ever truly cared about him. She had learned his secret like all the rest and had fled from him in horror; she could not possibly have any contact with a man of his repute. Her departure had almost crushed him. But now, now she was coming back and did not think he could face her again. This was the thought that had been tormenting him for the past forty-eight hours. A thousand questions were running through his head, "what was she doing here?" "Did she know he was here?" "Was she still disgusted and repelled by him?" "Did she know that he had changed?" "Would she even acknowledge him?" And the list went on and on, "Why, why, why, WHY!" "What, what, what, WHAT!" "How, how, how, HOW!" Until he felt his brain would burst. She was the only one who could give him answers, but how could he be sure that the moment she saw him she wouldn't run away, or snub him, or slap him clear across the face as she had done once or twice in the past. 

And so he sat at his desk for a good half-hour contemplating, trying to sort out the mob of thoughts and emotions till he thought he might just kick a hole in the wall from pure exasperation. But before he could implement his grand plan of causing the school to collapse by kicking through the foundation he was interrupted by a knock at his classroom door. He lifted his head and just barely found his oh so charming sarcastic to hiss, "Come in." (Severus had to be sarcastic about everything, it was his shield to disguise his misery and loneliness.) 

Severus came out from around his desk to tower over the tiny second year that had just entered his classroom. "Please professor, Professor Dumbldore requests that you join him and the other professors out on the castle steps to greet the new guests." "Oh course" Snape muttered to himself. "You may inform the headmaster that I shall be up as soon as I can and that I am terribly sorry if my teaching preparations inconvenience him!" The little second year found nothing to answer Snape's last remark without seeming disrespectful. So it was with those words and with one of Snape's ever famous sneers that he left the classroom, determined not to tell the head master the second part of Severus's message. 

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Severus took his time making his way up to the front steps, first making sure that he was wearing his work robes, which were in the worst condition. He wanted to put these ambassadors in their place, let them know exactly where they stood in eyes of Severus Snape, the greatest spy never known. 

When he reached the front doors he stopped a few paces sort to examine himself in a full-length mirror that hung on the wall to his right. "Let's see," he said to himself. "Greasy hair, check." "Classic sneer, check." "Frayed collar and sleeves, check." "Dirtied robe, check." "And my favorite; disemboweling shoes, check!" And with that he stepped away from the mirror and opened the doors to file into the back of the clump of chattering teachers (all except professor Binns of course!). 

They stood waiting like this for another half-hour or so before Dumbldore stood up from the front step where he'd been sitting and announced with no uncertain delight, "They're coming!" Every other teacher seemed to take up the headmaster's delight, you could even detect a note of life Binns. "What's so grand about another! Group of ambassadors, particularly ones who can't even manage to show up on time!" Well this was what he got for missing all those campy staff meetings in favor of sulking in his office and feeling sorrow for himself.

It wasn't long before four horseless carriages could be seen charging toward the school at break neck speed. Severus heard Professor McGonagull mutter, "My they're an offal large group, where will be able to keep them all?" "Well none of 'em are staying in my dungeon, no sir." "I'll have slap happy fresh water fish freak taking up what little space I have as it is." Severus thought. He had begun to rock back and forth on the balls of his feet with impatience. He had a thousand other things to yet today, (besides feeling sorry for himself). And here he was standing outside in the bitter November air waiting for people he didn't know, and most likely didn't want to know, to talk about something he'd rather not think about, and all on his free time! 

The carriages slammed to a haul about two yards form the castle steps. Immediately Dumbldore jumped up and beat the footman who'd been riding at the back of the last carriage to the door. He courteously assisted each passenger out, but there seemed to be an air of impatience in his manner, which was most unlike him. Severus decided that he had fulfilled his duty, he would be formally introduced to all the "Sirs, Madams, and I didn't quite catch your names" tonight at the feast. It was not his responsibility to tote all the excess these people had brought with them. He had no further purpose here and with that decided he turned on his heels and went back inside. 

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However had Severus stayed but a few moments longer he would have been able to witness the last passenger of the last carriage. A slight person draped in a light dark green velvet cape step from the carriage into Dumbldore's arms as they encircled the figure in a tight affectionate embrace. And had Severus waited for the visitors to ascend the steps and walk past him he would have been able to catch the slight scent of Freesia among the throng of people. 

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So, what do you guys think, I'm more than happy to take suggestions. Sorry if it's kinda sappy, but hey, it's my first fic and I got time to improve.

Till next time J

P.S. 

Special thanks to Moxie for helping me get on, You're the best 


	3. Facing the Past

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Facing the Past

Severus had no idea that the person whose coming he was, at that very moment dreading, had already arrived. Indeed, she was almost directly above him in Dumbledore's office. So it did not occur to him that he would be wise to keep to his dungeon for the next, oh decade or so. And still silently fretting he went up to dinner.

**********Upstairs**********

"Here," Dumbledore held out his hand, "let me take your cape." "Thank you," said the young woman with dark red-brown hair who was standing next to the headmaster in his office. She shrugged off the heavy velvet cloak and handed it over to him. He turned around and hung it on a rack by the door. "I don't know why I still wear that, it's heavy, hot, old, and it's ripped." Dumbledore turned around and smiled at his daughter, "You always were the fretter. Oh! It's so good to see you, I've missed you so much!" He walked back over and hugged her again and she buried her face in the silver hair that hung on his shoulders. "You're not the only one whose missed, it's never been easy for me to be without you." She said when they finally broke apart. "I can well remember," said Dumbledore with that familiar twinkle of happiness and mischief combined. "Indeed, all those nights I'd have to fly out of here because your nanny couldn't get you to come out from under the bed." "Oh that was just a ploy to get you to come. I never got to see you much back then." Now the same twinkle was in her eyes and for a moment there was an uncanny resemblance between father and daughter.

They both sat in the two chairs in front of Dumbledore's desk. For a few moments Dumbledore regarded his daughter in silence. Truly he was relieved she was here. He needed the help of someone he could trust, now more than ever, and he had missed her something fierce, after all, she was all he had left to cherish. Reaching out he took her hand, "You have no idea how much I appreciate this Deidra, I know this is a lot to ask, even of you, but I can think of no one else who I could trust and be able to work with." She put her other hand over his and looked him in the eyes. "It's perfectly alright, I've been looking forward to the day when I could return the favor and take care of you for a change for a long time. I'm just glad that you knew you could turn to me." He smiled at her and touched her cheek, "I knew I could call on you because you're like your mother, more than capable to any task that's set before you, even the care of entire school." Deidra blushed and looked down. "I only wish I were half the woman my mother was, nor will I be looking after an entire school by myself." Dumbledore smiled again, lifting his daughter's chin, forcing her to look at him. "You're more like your mother than you'll ever know and just as capable as she was. But don't be surprised if you do end up looking after the school by yourself. Don't get me wrong, these teachers are all fine people, and Minerva means well, but they're all to personal to truly look after the school. That's why I need you. I'm being tied up in none school related things more and more lately." He sighed and patted her hand. "I'm getting old, don't tell me I'm not Deidra, two hundred and fifty years that is old, and I can't handle it all anymore." Deidra began to rise to protest, but Dumbledore gently pulled her back down. "Don't worry, I don't plan on going anywhere for quite some time yet. But Voldemort has returned, Fudge will do nothing and half the population won't even believe it. If I do not do what I can now, we are all doomed. Yet at the same time I must be sure that this school and its charges are safe. That's why I need you to help me. I need someone to take over some of the more domestic matters of the post of headmaster. So that I need only focus on the safety and security of Hogwarts, not its menus, or minor discipline problems that my staff is to flustered to deal with by themselves. Can you do this for me? Can you be the Headmistress of Hogwarts as it used to be?" Deidra smiled and softly chuckled, "Yes father, I think I can do that for you." He patted her knee before rising. "Good, let's go down to dinner, I can imagine it'll be better than most of the food you've had for the last week or so." "It probably will be if it's anything like the Hogwarts food I remember." She said before rising herself and following him out the office. 

Just outside the door Dumbledore stopped and looked at Deidra. "My, I am getting old, look at you, my little baby. You've turned into a grown woman while I wasn't looking, and what a beautiful woman at that. The very image of your mother, oh if she could see you. She would be so proud, just as I am." Deidra looked away to avoid her fathers gaze. "Once again you over rate me, but you are right about one thing, I am a woman now, more so than the last time I was here." Dumbledore took her hand and shook his head. "Just like your mother." And hand in hand Dumbledore led his daughter down to the great hall.

**********The Great Hall**********

Severus had been staring at his plate, lost in thought. He did not notice Dumbledore come in and take the seat next to him and so failed to notice the woman that was with him. It was only when he heard a laughter to familiar for comfort did he look up to notice the other people at the table, and it was then that he caught the scent of freesia and the face that he would forever connect with it. Unable to control himself he sucked in his breath quite sharply. So sharply that it drew the attention of several others at the table who turned to see what had caused the potions master to make such an irregular sound. Among the heads turned was Deidra's who for the first time noticed the person who was occupying the seat to her father's right. 

Quickly they both turned away. Severus to Professor Sprout, anxious to talk to anyone who would listen about the early progress of her latest patch if Boober Tubers. And Deidra to Professor McGonagall who, having known Deidra since birth (she was Deidra's nanny before she taught at Hogwarts) was overjoyed to see her again. And for the rest of dinner Severus avoided looking to his left and Deidra to her right. 

Severus barely touched his food and after listening to Sprout about her Tubers for about ten minutes left the Hall in the greatest hurry. Deidra looked up and watched the back of his head disappear with a ripping feeling in her stomach. She had not known that Severus taught at Hogwarts and her father had not mentioned it. Slowly she rose and, bidding a hasty goodnight to her father and Professor McGonagall quickly left the Hall for her room on the third floor. 

Once inside she sank to the floor and buried her head in her hands, trying to hold back her tears. How was she supposed to look after this school if she was constantly trying to hide from Severus. Indeed just when she had thought herself ready to start a new life and put her mistakes behind her along comes a fresh reminder. It tore her heart to think of Severus, of what had happened, of what had not happened, of what could have happened. But most of all, of her own cowardly behavior. No, she was not like her mother and if anything could prove that it was her history with Severus. _But you have a second chance now. _A little voice said inside her head. _Why are you up here hiding in your room, your mother would never have hid from anything._ "No," said Deidra, laughing bitterly, "My mother would not have hid from a second chance to make things right." Then abruptly she stood up and walked out of the room and back downstairs, toward the dungeons.

So, now we have some answers, but what to do next review and let me know what you guys think I should do next. 


	4. Dawn Watch

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Dawn Watch

Severus stalked down to the dungeons as fast as he could, not daring to look behind him. Brushing aside several of the newer Slytherins, eager to kiss up to their head of house, he stormed into his office and slammed the door behind him, upsetting some of the papers that had been laying on the edge of his desk. As he bent to pick them up he mumbled to himself, "Just popped in out of nowhere, what does she think she's doing, upset my life all over again, just when I was finally getting it back together!" After he had straightened the pile of papers he stood up and replaced them on the edge of the desk. Then, seized by a sudden fit of fury he knocked them off again so they fell to the floor in a frenzied shower. 

Feeling helpless he slammed his fists on the desktop. He suddenly felt like a caged animal being baited by a pitchfork. A nasty voice sounded in the back of his head, _fool, you're a fool, she's never given you a second thought, she's just here to help her father. She wants nothing to do with you; she wouldn't even look at you during dinner. _Severus felt crushed, surely this was the truth, but then he heard another voice, _but you couldn't look at her either, you won't know her true feelings until she chooses to reveal them._

Severus pressed his hands to the side of his head, trying to stop the endless flow of voices in his head telling him everything from _she'll spit in your face the next time she sees you,_ to, _she still loves you, she's just afraid you don't love her._ Desperate to calm his throbbing head, Severus began rifling through his desk drawers for a sleeping potion.

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Actually Severus's last thought was fairly accurate, which was what caused Deidra to stop dead in her tracks on her way toward the dungeons. 

She had been mentally pushing herself along, telling herself that this was the best way to handle things, but she stopped in the middle of the stairs down to the first floor, her head dizzy with doubt. _What if he wanted nothing to do her. _Or worse, _what if seeing her caused him too much pain. _She'd seen the way he'd behaved at dinner and had behaved the same way, partly from shock, she had not known he was a teacher here. Partly to spare him any embarrassment that the situation might have caused him. She had decided during dinner that it would be better for everyone if she and Severus worked out their discomforts privately, and at first she had thought that the sooner the matter was dealt with, the better. 

But now as she saw herself entering his dungeon, and his life again, she wasn't sure that sooner was necessarily better. After all, she had no way of predicting how he would receive he privately. It was clear, at least for the present, that when in public, he wished to deny any prior affiliation. But when it was just the two of them, there was no way of knowing how he would react. There was a range of responses infinitely long, and Deidra had seen no inclination in his behavior to indicate which it would be.

Even a moment's hesitation would have been enough to brake Deidra's resolve, and, feeling very defeated, she turned on the stairs and headed back up toward her room. 

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Severus had literally torn his office and bedroom apart and still he could not find his flask of sleeping potion. He knew he would not be able to sleep tonight without it. There was too much on his mind. Well actually there was only one thing on his mind, Deidra, but she was taking up every inch of thought he had. He also knew that he would not have the patience or concentration needed to brew another sleeping potion. He'd probably end up turning himself into a classroom stool with his luck. 

So, feeling quite defeated, Severus threw himself into his desk chair and tried with all his might to think of anything other than Deidra Dumbledore. 

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Deidra slipped back into her room, feeling as though she might sink into the floor. Why was fate so cruel. Now, at this most crucial moment in her life she was forced to come face to face with the man she had spent the last sixteen years trying to forget, and who she was sure desperately wanted to forget her. They had hurt each other to the core. 

Sometimes Deidra thought that if someone were to have an x-ray taken of her they would be able to see the gaping hole where she was supposed to have had a heart. The repercussions of her relationship with Severus Snape had turned her into a walking dead who wanted only to go on with her life avoiding all contact with anyone. She had almost achieved that goal, but for her father. He, unlike every other person who had occupied a place in her heart or mind, had refused to be pushed away. And now that she thought about it, Deidra was glad he had resisted her aloofness. For it was this last human contact that now allowed Deidra a second chance at life, and maybe love.

Deidra looked around at the satiny darkness of her room and tried to embrace the thought of emptiness. But it would not take, and in the end she settled for planting herself on her window seat, staring into the star-pocked darkness, standing watch for the golden dawn and the answers to her endless questions. 


	5. An Unexpected Forgiveness

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An Unexpected Forgiveness

Severus had tried everything short of ramming himself into the wall head first, but still he was unable to get any rest and it showed the next day in class.

"Potter, I thought I told you not to work with Miss Granger, for once! Twenty points from Gryffindor and detentions for both of you! And if I hear anything from either of you, or you Mr. Weasley, for that matter, I shall continue to add detentions to your present sentences. Now everyone, back to work, you're in class, not the cinema!" 

Every student at Hogwarts stayed clear of Snape that day, and word got around the castle fast that the potions master was inches away from blowing everyone up. 

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Deidra had fallen asleep on her window seat and only awoke when the sound of persistent tapping reached her ears and her exhausted mind connected the sound with the possibility of someone knocking on her door. Very slowly she got up and inched her way to the door, every muscle in her body stiff from her night vigil. When she opened the door she was surprised to see her father standing outside. 

"Father, lord what time is it?" Dumbledore smiled broadly and lifted his left wrist to check his watch. "Oh I'd say it's just about lunch time, feel like some?" Deidra thought for a moment and discovered a rumbling in her gut that answered her father's question for her. "Sure, I could do with something to eat, just give a moment to change my cloths." Dumbledore nodded and Deidra shut the door to allow herself some privacy. Going to her trunk that now stood at the foot of her bed, she flung it open and rifled in it for something warm to wear under her wizards robe. 

She settled for a pair of dark pants and a dark green cashmere v-neck sweater. Over that she pulled on her royal purple wizard robe and quickly checked herself in the mirror. She didn't have much time, so she settled for bending down and shacking her hair out vigorously before straightening up and pushing it behind her shoulders. Smoothing out her robe she opened the door and stepped out. 

Dumbledore smiled at her and patted her shoulder; "We must get you an alarm clock, so that you won't miss breakfast everyday." He started off down the corridor and Deidra fell in step behind him shaking her head. _Hopefully I won't be up ever night worrying until my head collapses. _

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Severus arrived at the lunch table after everyone else. He was careful to sit all the way at the end of the table, thereby putting some distance, namely professors Sprout, Flitwick, Vector, and Hagrid between himself and Deidra. 

He ate as quickly as possible then made straight for the dungeons. Deidra watched his back slowly recede with a heavy sadness. _Why did he have to be so dejecting toward her? He hadn't even been able to look at her since she'd arrived._

Deidra didn't know what to do, so she decided that the best thing to do would be to start doing the job she was here for, help run and maintain Hogwarts so that her father could be free to pursue more important matters. _Well_, she thought, _What should I do first? _The truth was she didn't know what should could do at this moment, there seemed to be no problems with the students, staff, or facility at present. 

Shrugging her shoulders Deidra stood up and made to leave. "Where are you headed?" Asked professor McGonagall. "Well," Deidra said, turning back around to face Minerva, "I can't see anything productive I can do at present, so I thought I'd look into getting myself a book to occupy myself." "Oh, well if you're looking for a good read, perhaps I could recommend something." "Thank you, but I think I kind of have something already in mind." Deidra smiled at Minerva and waved to her father before turning around again and leaving the hall.

It wasn't that she wouldn't have appreciated Minerva's suggestions, because in fact she really didn't have anything particular in mind. It was just that she was really anxious to get out of that stuffy, noisy hall. In fact, she was in such a hurry to find some peace and quiet, that she didn't notice the dark clad figure leaning in the shadows on the opposite wall.

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Though Severus had intended to go right back and continue holing up in his dungeon, when he had gotten outside the hall and some of the pressure and insecurity he always felt when he was around Deidra had subsided, an idea struck him. If he waited for her to come out, and then followed her without her knowing he might be able to figure out what she was doing here. It was the ideal situation, at the ideal time, on the ideal day. He had no class after lunch on Thursday, and by hurrying out as fast as he could, everyone would assume that he was back in his dungeons, and so she would not think to be wary of him. 

He waited a good fifteen to twenty minutes before she came out. Not even glancing in his direction she turned right and up the stairs. Waiting till she had reached to top and gone off to the right, he then followed, careful to stay just far back enough to see where she was going. He followed her to the library and then inside. However he made the mistake of turning away to check on Madame Pince, after all it do no good to have rumors circulating that he was stalking the Headmaster's daughter in his spare time. So when he looked back Deidra had already disappeared in among the shelves. But rather than turn back now he chose rather to go in after her, after all, he would most likely have enough time to hide himself should he come upon her unexpectedly. 

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By the time Deidra had reached the library she had made up her mind to look in the restricted section. Not because she was looking for anything particular, but because as a young girl the restricted section had always been off limits, so now she wanted to see what it was like. Without even glancing at Madame Pince she headed straight back into the shelves of the restricted section, because after all, they were only restricted to students, and she was no longer a student. 

Stopping at the beginning of the first aisle she turned left, squeezing between the narrow rows she began to run her fingers along the leather bindings of the books as she had used to do in her father's library at home. Pausing here and there to examine a particular book more closely, it took her some time to get through the first row. Not finding anything that looked particularly interesting, she moved on to the second row. 

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It didn't take long for Severus to find her. There were only a few students in the library, most had classes. He listened and quickly picked up the soft sound of her shoes scraping against the carpet. Following the sound he found himself approaching the restricted section. Careful to stay a row behind the her, he watched Deidra through the gaps in the shelves. 

She had stopped and was bent over a red leather book. He decided that it might be safe to come around to her row, as long as he stayed close to the aisle, if she looked up he could duck back. Only, when he was standing several yards behind her he became intrigued as to what she was reading. She seemed so involved, surely if he just quickly looked over her shoulder she wouldn't notice. Before he even realized it, his body had acted on his thoughts, bringing him only a foot or so away from Deidra's back. 

Severus tried to get back before she turned and saw him. But as he was retreating he knocked his elbow on the shelf and before he could get out of the aisle Deidra had turned toward him.

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__

Deidra heard the thud of bone on wood and turned to see who was behind her. But she never would have suspected to see who she found. Severus Snape with a look on his face much like the boy who's just been caught trying to eavesdrop on his parents conversation. Before she could stop herself her hands flew to her face, dropping the book she'd been holding. 

Both people, trying to avoid the other's eyes bent at the same time for the fallen book. But instead of touching the book as both intended, their hands brushed. Deidra straightened abruptly while Severus retrieved the book and replaced it on the shelf. When he turned back he saw Deidra's eyes brimming with tears. Her lower lip was trembling and she seemed to be trying to focus on anything but him. 

He fought to keep himself from turning and fleeing, after all, this had to be dealt with, and they had come this far. All of a sudden Deidra's hands crossed the distance between them and grasped the front of his robes. He expected her to shake him or slap him, or scream. He had not expected her to pull him close to her so that her face was directly against his chest. He had not expected her to sob against his shirt and he heard her voice, not angry or enraged, but distraught. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, can you forgive me, can you ever forgive me for what I did to you, I didn't know." 

Before he realized it, Severus's body had betrayed him yet again. He had placed his arms on her back automatically, gently rubbing her back, trying to sooth her. As soon as he became aware of it, he knew what a mistake he'd made. In all those hours in his rooms he'd imagined their first confrontation to be a total war. He'd imagined himself reducing her to tears with recollections of how he'd suffered after she left him. He'd imagined she'd fight back, as she'd always done. He'd imagined them both walking away filled with bitterness and hatred. 

But now as he held his only love in his arms while she cried and begged his forgiveness he felt nothing but relief. Relief that the one he loved was where she should be, in his arms. While he held her, trying to soothe her, Severus felt every ounce of resolve weaken, and he laid his cheek against the top of her head and began to cry himself.


	6. Falling Together; Caught by Each Other

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Falling Together; Caught by Each Other

Severus did not wish to let go of her, fearing she might slip away yet again. But as he stood there he slowly began to regain his awareness and it came to him, they were in the library, in the middle of the day. What's more, Deidra had been speaking rather loudly, who knew who had heard them. Any minute Madame Pince, or anyone else, who had happened to be in the library for that matter, could come around the corner and them like this. He didn't want that, not yet. He wanted he and Deidra to have time to talk before they faced anyone else with their situation.

Reluctantly he released his hold around Deidra, causing her to snap her head up suddenly from where it had settled against his chest. A look of panic crossed her face; she had opened herself up and placed herself at his mercy. Seeing the fear in her eyes Severus gently brought his hand to her face, brushing away the tears that were silently falling down her face away with the tips of his fingers. He brought his hand to rest with his finger to her lips, indicating that she should be quiet. She nodded and he took his finger away, motioning for her to follow him. She nodded again and set off toward the library entrance. She waited awhile then proceeded in that direction herself.

######################################^#################################

Deidra walked through the halls in a daze, Severus's head always just in sight ahead of her. She still wasn't sure what was going on, or what Severus was feeling. True he'd held her when she'd gone to pieces. But there hadn't been any real implication of what he felt, he could have simply been trying to calm her before the entire castle became aware that the headmaster's daughter was losing control of herself just because the potions master had walked up behind her unnoticed. All Deidra knew was that she'd have no peace till this was resolved, one way or another. 

She almost didn't need to keep him in sight. There was only one place he could be heading, the dungeons. It made sense; his classroom would be the only place in this whole castle where they might truly have some privacy to talk. Even in her own rooms they ran the risk of interruption, not to mention, if they were interrupted there they would both be seriously compromised. 

Once this was realized everything began to blur. Deidra wound her way through countless corridors without even noticing. The dark gray stone seemed unreal and permeable. Nothing in the world seemed solid; nothing dependable, she was descending into the depths of an endless void, and the only one who could save her was Severus. 

And it was because of this that she found herself standing outside the door to the potions classroom. She was suddenly seized by an immense fear, whatever was meant to happen, once she walked over this threshold her life would change forever. She would either finally be reunited with the other half of her heart, or be forced to spend the rest of her life alone, for Deidra knew for certain, standing outside his door, that the only person she could ever possibly love was Severus Snape. And if she could not be reconciled with him there would be no one else, ever.

Standing there Deidra felt like a prisoner awaiting the jury's decision of whether or not they are to live. And it was like this that Severus found her. 

************************************^***********************************

_Where was she? Shouldn't she be here by now? _The growing impatience and fear grew inside Severus until he felt it might choke him. Finally when he could stand it no longer he opened the door to look out and see if she was coming. Expecting to see her just turning the corner of the passage, Severus was quite taken aback to see Deidra standing just outside of the door, a look of frozen dread on her face. 

For a few moments they just stood there, truly looking at each other for the first time in years. Severus felt rooted in his spot, and it seemed that Deidra was unable to move as well. Trying to initiate something, Severus stood aside so that Deidra could come inside. He tried to appear calm, but all the while feeling his heart rising up his throat. Was she toying with him? How much longer would they be able to stand this frozen pace? All at once Severus's senses became very sharp. He was keenly aware of the soft scent of freesia that he always connected with Deidra. Aware of the sound of her sharp, short breath intakes which seemed to broadcast the anxiety that she too was experiencing. Aware of her feet just barely beginning to inch over the threshold and he thought he might faint. He felt intoxicated, he was drowning in Deidra, and it was reveling, and terrifying at the same time.

###################################^#################################### 

Deidra was about to die. She could stand it no longer and began to move her foot, which now felt as if it were made of lead, across the threshold. It was almost as though she was encountering a physical resistance as she tried to enter the room, her dread was so great. _Just a step more and it will all be over, just do it, just do it, just…do…it… _

And she had done it. She was inside the room. She moved closer to the center to allow Severus to close the door. As soon as she heard the latch catch she lost control again. Weeping freely she felt her body trembling. But then she felt something else. A warmth at her back, and she turned around and stood face to face again with Severus, their noses almost touching. 

His gaze transfixed her, she forget everything else but those two black moons which seemed to radiate their own light. She felt numb, none of her senses were responding to the messages her brain, and once again she felt the sensation of falling through the abyss. _Catch me Severus, please. You're the only one who can, please don't let me fall into oblivion, please, catch me. _And it was at that moment that she regained some of her feeling. Enough to recognize his hands cupping her cheeks. They felt pleasantly cool against her burning face and she held his hands in place with her own. 

She looked into his face and saw the tender affection that he had trying to hide, "You don't hate," she whispered, and she began to cry again. She didn't seem to be able to control herself today, it felt very strange and Deidra fought to contain the endless flood that seem to break free no matter how hard she tried to hold it back. 

"No," he soothed, "I could never hate you. You are all in this world that I have to love." He wiped her tears away with the thumbs of his hands, elated by the softness of her damp skin, softer than silk, yet stronger, warmer. 

"If you loved me then why did you stay away?" she sobbed, pressing her face into his hands, taking comfort from their strength and steadiness. 

Severus bowed his head, afraid of how she would respond to his answer, "I stayed away because you hated me. That's why you left me in the first place I thought, you hated me." He held his breath, waiting for conformation of what had tormented him for the better part of sixteen years.

Deidra let out a noise that was midway between a sob and a strangled laugh, "Never, I never hated you. I left because I was selfish. I left because I thought if I couldn't change your ways then it would be too much work to stay and try and work through it, and I've regretted it everyday since. Can you forgive me? You don't even have to speak to me again if you don't want to, just say you forgive me." She buried her face in his hands and he felt her tears gathering in the palms of his hands.

"Forgive you, it is I should beg forgiveness. After what I did, I marvel that you even hesitated, or gave me a second thought. I betrayed everything we ever shared and I put you at risk. No, no it is your forgiveness that is needed, not mine." 

Deidra did laugh then, it was a very pitiful one, but when she lifted her head again Severus saw a little bit of the sparkle in her eyes that was so infamous of her father. "Oh my love," she said, sliding her hands to the back of his neck, "I think that for both our sanity's sake we'd better forgive each other."

Then Severus laughed too. "I think I can handle that, Deidra Dumbledore, I forgive you, but only if you forgive me."

She pulled his head forward so that their foreheads rested against each other's, "with all my heart."

Severus shook his head, "well one thing hasn't changed, we still certainly know how to make a royal mess of things. He we are playing hide and seek on each other, torturing ourselves and everyone around us, at least I have. And all we had to do was actually face each other."

Deidra wrapped her arms around his neck, "yes we certainly did drag this whole affair out a bit longer than it needed to be, but what do we do now?" She felt his hands circle her waist and slowly move up and down her back.

"I think," Severus smiled into her face, "That we should start by telling each other where we've been holed up for the past sixteen years"

"Yes, that would be a good place to start," Deidra said, nestling her face into the crook of his neck.

"That way you can tell me all about the numerous men who have bested me." Severus was trying to be funny, but there was a hint of worry in his voice.

"My, that'll be the shortest list ever read." Deidra said, sensing that little edge of worry in his question.

"Forty, thirty-five, or should I go higher?" It was his turn to try to keep his cook now.

"Lower," Deidra whispered, planting a little kiss just below his ear.

"How much lower?" Severus's voice cracked. When he and Deidra had first met she'd been the young sheltered beauty who had been in awe of his age and "supposed" experience. What would he have to live up to now. She'd been floating around the world for sixteen years, she was beautiful, intelligent, and passionate. Even if there had been only one other, he would still have to be better than him to hold this brilliant angel that had somehow fallen into his arms.

"None." She kissed his right cheek and raised her head and looked at him, grinning devilishly, "None but Severus Snape, after you none could compare."

A wave of exultation ran through Severus, and, feeling a bit braver he placed his hand at the nap of her neck and drew her to him, catching her lips with his. She melted against him immediately, tightening her arms and pressing against him. _We're falling Severus, but don't worry. From now on we'll catch each other, no matter how far we drop._


	7. Strange Conversations; Stranger Actions

****

Strange Conversations: Stranger Actions

As they kissed Severus felt as though he was suspended in space, suspended in time. All at once it seemed as if it had been an eternity since he had last held Deidra in his arms, and at the same moment it felt as though it had only been a day. Only a day since he had returned from that Death Eater rally to find that Deidra's room was empty and that she had left… for good. 

There had been no note, no explanation, no hint and Severus had thought he'd lost her forever. He remembered standing in the middle of that empty room for hours. That had been the first time in his life he'd ever cried.

Now if felt as though he were still standing there and Deidra had just walked back in. It had all been a big hoax, she wasn't really going anywhere, she was still his. But then Severus opened his eyes. Yes Deidra was there, yes they were kissing. But they weren't in her old room; they were in his dungeon classroom. And they were both much older, each one aged far beyond their years by the pain they had caused one another. 

He pulled away and reached up to touch her hair. "It's so much darker than the last time I saw you." He said, running his fingers through a stray lock. Deidra smiled and pulled the strand away and looked at it, as though for the first time. "It is darker. I never really paid attention, must be from all those years working outside." She ran her hand down the side of Severus's face, "You haven't changed much though." Severus shrugged, "No, most of my changes happened on the inside, not out."

##################################^#####################################

While they'd stood holding each other they'd been oblivious to time, so it was quite a shock when they heard the clocks all around the school chime the dinner hour. Deidra gave a cry of dismay. "Oh, I completely forgot!" "What?" Severus asked. "I'm supposed to be up there," Deidra made a frustrated gesture toward the dungeon ceiling. "Father said that he was going to introduce me to the students tonight at dinner."

Severus let go of her looking a little perplexed, "Introduce you as what?" He said not quite sure what Deidra was talking about. "Oh lord, you mean he didn't tell the teachers yet either?" Deidra looked at Severus who shook his head. She sighed; this was going to make it even worse. "The reason I came was father asked me to come and help him run the school, kind of temporary headmistress, until something's done about Lord Voldemort. Since the ministry won't even believe that he's back father needs to take action now, before Voldemort starts his attacks again. But he can't do that if he has the school to worry about as well. So I here to take care of all the domestic matters regarding to school and assist with the protection of the students and grounds." Severus dropped his arms and looked at her, "but why didn't he just have Minerva take over, she is deputy headmistress?" Deidra shrugged, "He may need Minerva's help, and if the school were to be attacked while father was away there's no guarantee that she could hold off the attack. My father believes that I can, though there are moments when I seriously doubt him."

Deidra turned and made for the door; "well we'd better start heading up then?" "No, I really don't feel like dinner, got too much on my mind. It's funny, ever since I knew you were here my head's felt like it's just about ready to explode and I thought that if we resolved this, one way or another, I'd have some piece. Well we've resolved it, but my mind still feels over full." Deidra laughed and turned around, "I know, mine too. Well if you're not coming then should I come back here after dinner?" Severus looked down, pretending to examine a nearby desk, "It's up to you, I'm not going to be going anywhere." She smiled and shook her head, as though she were dealing with an uneasy child. She walked back over to him and lifted her chin with her hand. She kissed him lightly on the lips and whispered, "Then I'll see you in an hour or less." With that she turned and walked out the door. 

Severus stood stock-still. He shakily brought his fingers to his lips, _the lips she had kissed._ He examined the front of his robes, they were still wet from her tears and they still smelled of freesia. For a moment Severus thought he'd never wear or wash these robes again. So they would always hold the moisture of her tears and carry her scent. Then, coming to his senses he laughed to himself and thought, _why bother, from now on you have the original, what need is there for mementos. _

With that thought in mind he rushed through his study to his bedroom. Scanning the room rapidly he found what he was looking for. He strode over to his nightstand and picked up the pouch that lay on it. Inside were the lock of hair, and piece of fabric that had belonged to Deidra, along with the ring. 

Stuffing the ring in his pocket he took the pouch over to the fireplace. He held it out, ready to throw it in thinking to himself, _no more nights of wretched remembrance, no more sorrow over a ruined past. _But he found he could not do it, the things inside that tiny pouch had changed his life in so many ways, perhaps it was better to keep them. Yes he would keep them, so as to never forget what a fool he'd been, and how much it had cost him.

Turning his back on the fireplace he walked back to his bed and placed the pouch under his pillow.

**********************************^*************************************

Deidra rushed up the stairs and through the halls to the great hall. She managed to slip in the side door to the teacher's table just as Dumbledore had told the students to sit down. He heard her rushing up the steps and looked over. He smiled when he saw her. Her face was flustered from her run through the halls; her hair was in a disarray and she was breathing hard. 

She all but threw herself into the chair next to him and slumped over her empty plate. Dumbledore bent down and whispered in her ear, "shall I introduce you now, or wait till you've recovered a bit?" 

Deidra sighed and pulled her head up just so that she was audible and said, "might as well be now. I not likely to recover much during the course of this meal." Dumbledore straightened and chuckled to himself, his daughter did have a tendency to be over dramatic, _just like her mother, _and this was just another case.

Turning to face the students he raised his hands for silence. "Ladies and gentlemen, I have an announcement. As you will recall I told you all at the end of last year, that Lord Voldemort has returned. Since that time, the ministry has chosen to take no action, so, it falls to me and my fellow teachers to do all we can to ensure the safety of you, and all the other members of the wizarding world. For me to carry on a full fight against Voldemort and his forces as well as continuing to function as headmaster of this school would be to compromise your safety, as well as the safety of those who are helping me fight Lord Voldemort. It is because that I have found a person to fulfill the post of Headmistress for as long as I am required to split my attention between the school and Lord Voldemort. I will in turn, take up the position of deputy Headmaster until the time comes when I can once again devote my full attention to the school. Until that time, I have invited my daughter, Deidra Dumbledore, to come and stay with us at Hogwarts and be a surrogate Headmistress."

When Dumbledore finished his speech there was not a sound to be heard in the great hall. Every face was turned to Dumbledore and the young woman sitting next to him. Deidra covered her head, which was still slumped on the table, with her hands and groaned. 

Minerva, who had been the only other person who'd been privy to this decision leaned over and tapped Deidra on the shoulder, "I think you'd better sit up and look a little more lively dear, you're quite the center of attention." "I know," Deidra moaned again. But she lifted her head, and when she did she appeared to be the ultimate picture of calm and composure.

Deidra stood up beside her father and turned to face the students. As she turned Dumbledore caught a glance at her, and though no one else saw it, for a moment she had the look of a prisoner about to face the firing squad. Looking out over the sea of faces. Swallowing a large amount of air she tried to think of something to say. She'd been a student once herself, for a brief span and she remembered how much it bored and annoyed her when teachers stud up a talked at her, especially when she was ready to eat. But Deidra also wanted to make it clear that, although it was only temporary, for the time being, she was the Headmistress of Hogwarts. 

Exhaling the breath that she'd only just realized she was holding she began to speak in what she hoped was a stern, but soothing voice, for these students were obviously quite taken aback by her father's announcement. "I was a student at Hogwarts myself once, and can identify with just about each and every one of you. So it is with that knowledge that I ask you all to give me your full cooperation throughout this year. We are all of us in a new and different situation. I promise you that I will do my utmost to see that at every moment you are all safe and able to carry on as much of your normal routine as possible. All I ask in return is that you cooperate fully with any measures I may take in the future to ensure safety and security. I also ask that some of you put aside your private entanglements in favor of general safety and productivity." At this her eyes flashed to the Gryffindor table and then to the Slytherin table. 

With that she plopped down on her seat and looked pleadingly at her father who extended his hands out over the table and shouted, "Gourme Ates!" and all over the hall plates started to fill with food. Deidra caught her father's eye and mouthed the words "Thank you" 

####################################^###################################

While the students stuffed their faces there was a great deal of talk about this new Headmistress. Over at the Gryffindor table Fred, George, Ron, Harry, Hermione, Lee, and Neville were all talking about her. "I like her," said George, "She's really pretty." "Yeah!" All he other boys agreed at once. "I bet she's really smart," said Hermione, who was glancing up at the teacher's table, "and she must be a very powerful wizard too." "What makes you say that?" Said Harry, looking at the table with new interest. "Well, she is Dumbledore's daughter, and he's the most powerful wizard there is." "But Hermione," Ron interrupted, "We all know that just because a parent has a lot of magic, doesn't mean their kid does too. I mean she could be a squib, or just a really bad wizard." "But Dumbledore said that more or less that he had to make sure that every one in the castle was protected incase he wasn't able to. That means that she's got to be really powerful, because he's trusting her with his job." Hermione leaned back in triumph. "She's got a point," said Neville before diving back into his food.

###################################^####################################

Deidra barely picked at her food, despite worried looks from both Dumbledore and McGonagall. She forced down a few bites before pulling back from the table and heading for the door. "Where are going?" Dumbledore asked, looking a little anxious. "Oh, I've still got some unpacking to do," she said waving him off, "and I want to get to bed early so I can catch breakfast tomorrow." That got a laugh from her father, and Deidra took it as her cue to slip back out the side door. 

She made her way back through the halls to the dungeons, but a little slower this time. When she got down the stairs to the dungeons and Severus's classroom she didn't even pause, but opened the door and walked right in.

***********************************^************************************

Severus heard the opening and closing of a door from inside his study and went out into the classroom to see who it was. He found Deidra leaning against the door looking somewhat out of sorts. She held out an arm to him and he came and enfolded her in his arms. "How do you stand it, all those faces staring at you, probing you. And that hall, it's like a beehive with all that buzzing." 

She laid her head on his shoulder and allowed herself to relax in his hold. Severus laughed softly into her hair and said, "You get used to the staring, and the hall, well that just becomes a necessary evil." That made Deidra laugh too, and she buried her face deeper into his shoulder. "I believe we were going to talk," Severus muttered against her head. "Yes, we were, weren't we" 

But before either of them had a chance to say anything else they were interrupted by a loud knock on the classroom door and the voice of a girl saying "Professor Snape, professor, we're here for our detentions." Severus groaned and let go of Deidra. Shaking his head he gestured toward the door and the two students behind it, "This too, becomes a necessary evil." 

Opening the door Severus glared down at the figures of Harry and Hermione. "Did I tell you to come tonight after dinner to serve your detentions." "No professor, but that's usually when you have us serve them, and since you didn't give us a specific time we figured…" Harry faltered, and Snape took advantage so as to move them on their way quickly. "You figured that I was at your disposal to serve your detentions when you were ready, because we all know perfectly well that you're only here because you have nothing better to do tonight and you wanted to get your detentions out of the way before something did come up. Well I'm sorry to have inconvenienced you Mr. Potter, but I have a prior engagement this evening so you will both have to serve you detentions some other time." With that Severus started to shut the door on them, but Hermione just had time to see Deidra standing a little ways behind Snape before he shut the door. 

"That was a bit harsh, don't you think," Deidra said, giving Severus a mock look of sternness. 

"Not at all. We were busy and they intruded." Severus locked the door this time and walked back over the where Deidra was standing.

She put her arms around his neck again and asked, "why lock the doors, do you plan on doing something that would be indecorous?" 

Severus let out a snort, "no, like I'd ever have the chance in this place. It's just that I'd rather not have any more interruptions and certain teachers are not inclined to knock, they just walk right in."

"And it would be so terrible if they saw us together?" Deidra pulled away a little bit, not liking what Severus was hinting at.

Severus reached up and smoothed some of the hair back from Dedira's face, "Not terrible for you, but for me, I'm a marked man you know."

"What's that supposed to mean." Deidra had completely extracted herself from Severus's arms now and gave him an accusing stare.

Severus shrugged his shoulders, "Deidra, we both know I used to, emphasis on used to, be a Death Eater. That means whether or not I've changed the kind of person I am, I still have this to always remind me, and everyone else that I committed the most terrible crime known today in the wizarding world. I betrayed it."

"But you're not, you didn't, betray anyone." Deidra had a tormented look on her face now, _how can he say that we both know that he was never really on Voldemort's side. Though I didn't find that out till too late._

"How do you know what I did and didn't do. If I recall correctly, you weren't present during that period of my life." Severus looked away from her, his voice full of bitterness.

"Father told me on one of his visits home what you were about, that you were really acting as spy for us." She reached out and touched his shoulder, "I could have killed myself after that, I had thrown away all my happiness before I even knew what was going on. I should have talked to you first and not relied on second hand information."

Severus turned back around and looked into her eyes, "then why didn't you come back. After you knew I wasn't really a Death Eater, why didn't you come back?"

Deidra lowered her head, shame written on every part of her body, "the truth was, I thought if I came back you'd hate me. I totally misjudged you, and I didn't even have the nerve to tell you I was leaving, I just slipped away like the coward I am."

Severus tilted her chin up and shook his head, "We've both made grave mistakes my dear, that left us vast scars on our hearts and this on my arm." He extended his left arm and pulled his sleeve back, exposing the dark mark on his forearm.

He'd expected Deidra to look away, to be horrified, as everyone else who'd ever seen it had. But she didn't, she stared straight at it, her face full of concentration. A few moments later she looked up at Severus's face again, and he was surprised to see a smile on he face. And it was not one of smugness, or disdain, it was a genuine warm smile.

Taking his arm in both her hands, she said, more to herself than Severus, "Well, at least I can make up for some of the mistakes I've made." 

##################################^#####################################

Severus felt a chill run through him as Deidra began to move her hands along his arm, _just like the dream, _he thought, and closed his eyes. Just like in the dream Severus's arm began to warm under her touch. Only this time Severus didn't wake up, and his arm grew warmer and warmer, until it was almost burning.

He tried to pull away, but she held his arm firm in both of hers. He opened his eyes then to see Deidra's eyes fixed on his scar, her face screwed up with concentration, muttering words he didn't understand. He looked down at his arm and saw that she held it with her right hand, and had her left palm suspended in the air just a few inches above his dark mark. And to his great surprise and horror, the mark was glowing a blinding white. And just before he felt himself about to loose consciousness he dimly connected the source of his pain with the his glowing scar. But before he could do anything else his vision began to blur and his knees started to buckle.


	8. The Mark of a New Man

****

The Mark of a New Man

Deidra had been so focused on the spell she was trying to perform that she didn't notice Severus's weakening state until it was too late. Before she could pull back his weight gave way and he fell to the floor unconscious, taking her with him. She pulled herself up from the floor and looked down at Severus's limp form. Kneeling down next to him, Deidra shook him violently, trying to revive him. 

"Severus, Severus, wake up, oh wake up damn it!" Feeling at a loss Deidra did the first thing which came to her mind, which was to raise her left hand and strike him hard in the face. But a moment after, when he started to respond to her ministrations, she deeply regretted her actions. As he tried, feebly to lift himself into a sitting position he faltered, and Deidra put her hands behind his shoulders to support him.

Now coming fully awake, Severus shook his head vigorously to try and clear it. Then he raised his right hand up to his face and ran it along his cheek where a red patch was already growing. "Jesus, first you try to burn my arm off, and then you beat on me to boot. I'm beginning to question you feelings Ms. Dumbledore." Severus leaned back against the nearest desk and tried to catch his breath.

"Oh Severus I'm sorry, I didn't know you would respond like that, and then when you wouldn't come around I didn't know what else to do, so I slapped you." She reached out and touched his cheek, which was now bright red and bore a mark similar to that of her hand, she winced. "I also didn't know I hit you that hard."

"Well take my word for it, you did." Severus said shaking his head again. "What were you trying to do to me anyway? Why was my arm burning?" Deidra smiled then; her mask of concern was dropped to reveal a face full of joyful pride. "Look and see," she said.

***********************************^************************************

Severus wasn't really in the mood for Deidra's games, but he also felt to tired to fight her. So he gingerly lifted his left arm and pulled back the sleeve, afraid of what he would see. He knew Deidra would never intentionally hurt him. But that burn he'd felt on his arm had been very intense, and he had no idea what it might have done to his skin. But nothing that had crossed his mind came anywhere close to what he found when he'd pushed his sleeve all the way back. 

Where his dark mark had been only moments ago, was nothing but clean skin and a small red blemish which might be found on anyone's arm. He gasped in surprise. Ever since he'd realized that he'd made a grave mistake my joining the Death Eaters he'd thought that that mark would haunt him until he died. Worse than any criminal record he'd spent most of his life trying to hid it. Wishing every spare moment that he could be rid of it. That he could truly show people he'd changed. 

He remembered the cold, disdainful looks he'd gotten when he'd joined the Hogwarts staff. Dumbledore had had to tell them, and any time he had to push his sleeves up to work he was exposed to anyone's wandering eyes. He'd tried scratching, cutting, even burning, but nothing touched the mark. It had been burned into him to the bone and there was no known spell or cure to remove it.

At this last thought he looked up at Deidra. She too had been looking at his arm and now she tentatively ran her fingernails along the path of his veins, from his wrist up to his elbow and back. Feeling his eyes on her she looked up into his eyes. 

"How?" he barely managed to whisper, "How could you do this, what did you do?" 

Deidra exhaled deeply and continued to run her fingers along the path of his arm. When she didn't answer her caught her hand in his and turned it over to examine the palm. He traced the lines of her palm with his fingers over and over, as if some how he would find the answer to the miracle she'd just performed woven into her hand somewhere. 

After a few moments he stopped and she let her hand drop. She still hadn't responded and her face had become a mask that he couldn't understand. Finally her couldn't stand it any longer. He reached out the distance between them and grasped her shoulders firmly in his hands. He shook her, as though he might be able to somehow shake the answer out of her. 

She brought her hands up and covered his with them. "You know, you're not the only one who got drained from that." He stopped then, but left his hands on her shoulders. 

Squaring her shoulders so she had to look directly at him her tried again, "Deidra, how were you able to do this?" He searched her eyes and at last saw a flicker of recognition and let his hands drop. "Please, can't you tell me?"

Deidra shifted and laid down with her head in Severus's lap. She was completely exhausted, and all she wanted to do was close her eyes and fall asleep in Severus's arms, but she did owe him an explanation. So she drew a deep, shaky breath and began. "The mark that was burned into your arm could only have burned itself into your skin with a raw force. A raw force is a force that gets its power from the force of a wizard's raw emotion that he or she has channeled so that it can be used for magical purposes. The idea was invented thousands of years ago by some old bitties that wanted wizards to find other ways of dealing with their anger. They figured all the big bad wizards would channel their anger into magically mowing the lawn. But of course no one did any such thing. Instead, everyone used the concept to make their spells longer lasting and more powerful. The ministry, realizing what this might lead to, outlawed the procedure, slapped all offenders with a life sentence in Azkaban, and destroyed all known written material dealing with the idea. Well of course you can't completely eliminate the idea of something, because there were people who'd heard of it, or tried it themselves, and throughout the years the idea of raw forces have been passed down by word of mouth. My father taught me about it himself. He said that if I was ever facing a real dark wizard then they would most likely know about raw forces, and if you're a dark wizard, you don't care if something's against the law. So he said I had to be able to fight it and use it myself."

"Well, now you know where it comes from, now I'll tell you what it has to do with you and what I just did. My guess is when Voldemort was developing his dark powers he explored the concept of raw forces and got very good at it. Because the only way something could be burned that far into your arm and not ever be able to be removed would be if he used a raw force. Now a raw force must be drawn from one's most powerful and profound emotion, for Voldemort it was his hate, and anger of the world and everything in it. But what most people didn't know about raw forces is that they can always be countered. Going back to what's stated in the muggle laws of physics, 'for every force or action, there is an opposite force or reaction.' This meant that any spell cast using a raw force can be countered, or undone by a spell using a raw force of an opposite emotion. Therefore all I had to do to remove the mark on your arm was to cast a common removal spell using the raw force of my most powerful positive emotion."

#####################################^##################################

Severus leaned against the desk, Deidra's head still laying in his lap, and he absently ran his fingers through it. Though he was too tired to look it, he was completely shocked by what he'd just heard. He'd never even known about raw forces, and Deidra had just used one to solve one of his most daunting personal obstacles. But then another thought struck him, "What was the emotion you used that was powerful enough to combat something as vast as Voldemort's hate?" 

Deidra had been nearly asleep when he asked her, but she had know from the very beginning that if she told him what she'd done, he'd ask that. She had tried to think of ways to avoid telling him the truth, but at that moment Deidra knew that it was probably best simply to tell him the truth. Reluctantly pulling herself up to a sitting position she turned and faced him. Down casting her eyes she felt her throat swell as she tried to force the words. She tried once, twice, and then on the third time she gritted her teeth and blurted out as fast as she could, "MY LOVE FOR YOU!"

Now Deidra was afraid. Though Severus had said he'd loved her, throughout their history he'd never taken to the idea of being loved himself. He made thousands of base excuses for why she had stayed with him. Whenever she'd tried to tell him she loved him he'd pushed her away. _What if he pushed her away now?_ She looked at his face, trying to read into the two black pits that seemed to be endlessly staring back at her. 

***********************************^************************************

Her words had shocked Severus out of the lethargy he'd sunk into since coming to after she'd put the spell on his arm. _Her love for, HIM!_ She'd said she loved him earlier, but he'd been sure that she'd been lying, just trying to get him back under her thumb. She didn't love him, no one did. How could anyone love him, Severus, the lowly, slimy Death Eater who'd been saved by the mercy of Albus Dumbledore. He loved Deidra with all his heart, but even when he'd kissed her not an hour ago, he'd been sure that she had no real love for him. 

But then he looked down at his left arm and a little voice in the back of his head whispered, _she does love you, there is your proof, undeniable, unfakable proof. _He turned away from her, unable to look at her. _Someone loved him. Someone loved him enough that her love for him was the most powerful emotion she possessed. _

Severus turned back and saw Deidra crouched on the floor shaking violently. Gingerly he reached out to stroke her hair, but she drew away. "Severus, I'm too tired to deal with this, if you can't deal with what I just told you, say so and I'll go, but don't make me stay and listen to your pathetic reasons why I shouldn't, couldn't love you, because I do, and there's no getting around it."

Severus reached out again, and this time her caught her and he held her close to him. "I know, I believe you now, and I'm sorry for being such a fool before, but don't leave, please?" He felt her limbs relax and took the chance to pull her even closer. Doing so he marveled at how she fit so well against him. He whispered into her ear, "You're tired, why don't you lie down for a while, then we can talk once you feel a bit more composed." 

Deidra mumbled something that he took for a yes. Very carefully he gathered her up in his arms and prepared for the long trek through the halls of Hogwarts. He looked down at Deidra, she was asleep now, and she looked so at peace. Her features were perfectly set in the calmness of sleep and there was a faint smile on her pale face. A thought came to Severus, he didn't want to be seen walking through the halls in the middle of the night carrying Dumbledore's daughter. He knew the truth, Deidra knew the truth, and he suspected that Dumbledore would believe them. But he knew what the other teachers would think, and how their opinion of Deidra would change, and he didn't want that for her. Well she had to sleep somewhere, he couldn't just stand here holding her all night. There was only one other place he could take her, and turning around he headed for the back entrance of the classroom, and the door to his room.

Once they were inside he pulled back his heavy comforter and gently laid her down on the mattress. He pulled the comforter back up over her and smoothed some stray hair that had fallen over her face. Severus had thought about sleeping on the floor, or in a chair in his study. But as he watched her sleep, it was like falling into a trance. He saw nothing but that small, soft, slumbering form and leaning against the post at the edge of his bed he settled down to watch over his love.


	9. Difficult Orders

****

Difficult Orders

Deidra awoke to a tumultuous pounding. Unsure if it was merely her own head or something outside she sat up. As her vision cleared she noted that she was laying a moderately large four poster bed which was not her own. She also could make out a slumped figure leaning on one of the foot posts. 

A moment later the figure at the base of the bed was roused by the sound of the knocking as well. When he straightened Deidra could see that it was Severus and reasoned from that that she must be in Severus's room. She looked up at Severus and could tell from the look on his face that he'd been there all night. He opened his mouth to speak, but before anything could come out the pounding on the door was joined by the call of a young boy, "Professor? Professor? We've got a situation in the common room, Professor!"

Severus looked at the door and seemed to finally comprehend the situation. Glancing over his shoulder he shouted, "Is anyone dead or dying?"

"No." Said the voice from behind the door.

Severus sighed in disgust, "Then it can wait a few moments, can't it Malfoy."

"Well I guess," the voice was a little bit uneasy now.

"Good, then return to the common room and I shall be there shortly." Severus had turned to face the door now, and though Deidra could not see his face she knew it read agitation quite clearly.

"Right Professor." And then the sound of receding footsteps could be heard in the corridor outside the door. Severus turned back to face Deidra; "You have to get back to your room, now, before anyone finds you here."

Deidra had swung her legs over the side of the bed and slid off it to the floor. "What's the hurry, I think there's still about a half hour till breakfast." She stretched and stood up.

Severus smiled in spite of himself. It was something no one would ever expect to see. Deidra Dumbledore, her hair a mess, her robes wrinkled and her eyes crusted with sleep and dried tears. Even he had thought it was impossible. Deidra was always so neat, so on top of things and in control that he'd thought she'd just pop out of bed ready made for another day, everything in perfect order.

Deidra clearly didn't share his amusement of the situation, for she put her hands on her hips and said in a rather short tone, "What?!"

That snapped Severus out of his private humor. Returning to his earlier frenzied state, he rushed Deidra toward the fireplace. The pounding on his door had returned and Severus knew it was only a matter of moments before the student became impatient and went to find someone else. Trying to keep his voice as low as possible he pointed toward the jar of powder next to the fireplace and whispered, "go, now, before someone sees you."

Deidra shrugged, she was too tired to challenge Severus right now, though she couldn't see what difference it would make if someone saw her in his room. Slowly, because she was stiff from her efforts last night, she bent down and grabbed a hand full of powder from the jar and threw it into the fire. She whispered, "Headmaster's guest room," and stepped into the fire. Severus just had time to see the last bit of her purple robes vanish into the flames before he turned back to the door and opened it. 

Outside stood a bony boy with pale blonde hair, he had a smug look of triumph on his face which made Severus uneasy. "This way professor, quickly. Two of the first years had a book from the restricted section and they started fighting over it, the common room's a mess." Snape sneered and gestured for Malfoy to lead on, he was in no mood for this, but it was unavoidable. 

#####################################^##################################

Stepping out of her own fireplace Deidra still felt a little dazed. As a rule she hated flue powder, but she had to admit at this moment that it did have its uses. Turning to face the full-length mirror that stood on the opposite side of the room, she took in her appearance for the first time that morning, and, just as Severus had, she laughed. But she didn't laugh for the same reasons. She was laughing because, as she took in her appearance, memories of the last two days came flooding back, and she laughed from sheer exhaustion. Like a runner who's just finished a tremendously long race and feels like he's going to die, and he laughs because even if he did does, he's made it.

Shedding her disheveled clothing she went over to her chest and found some new ones. Today she picked a close fitting, calf length skirt, a cream colored blouse, and simple black work robes. She also found her bottle of lotion and, before rushing out the door to breakfast, rubbed some all along her arms and neck.

***********************************^************************************

Severus managed to break apart the two scrawny first years and put the common room back into some semblance of order just in time to order all the Slytherins up to the great hall. He had no desire whatsoever to go to the great hall, or eat for that matter. But he knew if he continued to skip meals someone would notice and start asking questions. 

So, walking as slowly as possible, he followed his students out of the dungeons, up the stairs and into the hall. Walking up to the teacher's table he discovered, to his dismay, that the only seat left, was the one next to Deidra. Though personally he wouldn't have minded sitting next to her, he didn't want to draw the attention of any of the other teachers. He sat down and tried to concentrate on staring straight ahead. 

In fact he succeeded for the first few minutes, even when Deidra first inclined her head to talk to him he was able to not pay any attention. But when he didn't respond her voice broke with worry and she whispered, "Severus, are you all right?" He couldn't stand it anymore. Glancing about quickly to see that no one else was looking, he turned his head ever so slightly in Deidra's direction and, in what he hoped was a furtive manner, placed his hand on hers. 

"Yes, I'm alright, are you? I know I shoved you out of there pretty quick this morning." He ran his hand along her knuckles, trying to sooth her. It was clear she was still too fragile when it came to their relationship. He could not ignore her publicly without telling her first, for she would take it seriously.

"I think I'm alright, it's hard to tell after a night like last night." She shook her head and drew a shaky breath, "Why were you ignoring me?"

Severus looked around again, making sure no one was watching them, "I'll tell you later, I promise, but I don't think we should talk here, alright?"

Deidra swallowed hard, "Alright."

Both turned back to their breakfast, trying very hard not to look at each other constantly.

#####################################^##################################

Some of the teachers noticed that Severus had returned to the dinning table, and that he wasn't sitting where he usually sat, but other than that no one took any extra notice of the potions master, or the headmaster's daughter sitting together. Only Dumbledore understood the extraordinariness of the relationship that now played between his daughter and Severus Snape. For only he had paid enough attention during breakfast to notice two hands, at the very edge of the table, almost concealed by their robes, but iron locked. Albus had watched, not once during the meal had either on let go.

And only he had seen the two after breakfast. They had walked in the same direction for as long as possible, and they had had to split directions, he to the dungeons, she to her office, there had been a slight hesitance. Albus had to admit that whatever they were doing, they were concealing their emotions well. But Dumbledore was used to looking beyond what he saw. What he read from his daughter and the potions master, if his instincts were still there, was a powerful, powerful love. This made Dumbledore both delighted and sad. He was very pleased that those two had found each other again. After Deidra had left Hogwarts because she'd found out Severus was a Death Eater she'd become entirely withdrawn. She'd gone back to the house and shut herself up. She wouldn't see or talk to anyone, she'd even tried to push him away. It had been sixteen years of hell for her and Dumbledore had had to watch it, unable to do anything to ease her pain. 

As for Severus, after he'd found Deidra had left him, he'd reformed, given up the dark lord and his cause. But after that he was truly a broken man. Robbed of the only love he'd ever known, he'd had no will to do anything. Dumbledore had only been able to tempt him into his position at Hogwarts by appealing to Severus's sense of debt. Dumbledore had cleared the way for him at the ministry after he'd turned, and it was because of Dumbledore that Severus was not in Azcaban. 

Now fate, and Albus, had given them a second chance. But just as quickly as they'd been reunited, they'd have to be separated again, and that was what made Dumbledore sad. As happy as he was to see his daughter and former student find new life, they were both needed in the reinstated fight against Lord Voldemort, but to be effective, they were needed in different places, and it was Albus who now had to tell them.

*************************************^********************************** 

Deidra sat at her father's desk sorting through the piles of letters that had been coming in since the beginning of the school year. It seemed that many parents were not happy that Dumbledore had chosen to make the students aware of the return of Voldemort, and many had chosen to voice their opinions to the headmaster in no uncertain terms. Albus had not asked Deidra to do this, bust she thought that, since she didn't have anything else to do at the moment she might as well sort through the letters, and answer the ones that she felt her father didn't need to see. _Lord knows, _she thought, _he'd got enough to deal with without whining parents. He's trying to protect them, to protect us all, and all these puny people can do is gnaw at his elbow._

Several she didn't bother to answer or set aside for her father to see. She just tossed them up in the air and let Fawkes have target practice with. And that was how Dumbledore found them, Deidra bent over the endless stacks parchment and Fawkes in he middle of toasting another sheet.

Closing the door he walked around the ever-growing pile of ashes, "you were going to clean this up, weren't you?"

Deidra looked up and smiled, her face just barely visible over the stacks of parchment. "Oh sure, I just thought it would be better to wait and have them all done at once."

Dumbledore shrugged and sat down in front of the desk, "you could have just thrown them in the fire."

Deidra started lifting piles off the desk and placing them on the floor next to it, "that's how I started, but Fawkes was getting agitated, so I thought it would be better to let him have a shot at them." The phoenix let out a shrill note, stating its agreement. Silently Fawkes rose from his perch and flew to Dumbledore's knee. It settled there and Albus absently stroked its feathers as he thought.

"Deidra." At the sound of her name Deidra straightened.

"Yes," she said looking a bit perplexed, the tone of her father's voice was strange, and she didn't like it.

"I need you to come with me down to the teachers lounge, I am holding a meeting with some of the other teachers and what we're talking about concerns you as well." Dumbledore nudged Fawkes off his knee and made to rise.

"Right now?" Deidra looked at her father, he'd never seemed this old before, and it hurt her to see him like this.

"Yes, if you can." HE sighed and made for the door. Without a word she rose and followed, unsure of what her father had in mind.

####################################^###################################

The piece of paper had appeared on Severus's desk shortly after lunch, as it had for several other of the Hogwarts teachers, including Minerva McGonagall, and Rubus Hagrid.

It said that Dumbledore needed to talk to them in the staff lounge shortly before dinner, that they were to leave their classes and come at 4:05; their students were to be looked after.

So it was that at 4:10 Severus found himself in the lounge with McGonagall, and Hagrid waiting for Dumbledore. After about five minutes he showed up, Deidra at his heels. She took a seat close to the door, not looking at anyone. Dumbledore stood in the middle of the room, his back to the fireplace, facing the teachers and Deidra. "As you all know, Lord Voldemort has returned, and the ministry refuses to take any action. So, it is up to us. But before we can do anything, we must know where he is, and what he is planning to do. And that is what I need your help for. Minerva, I need you to fly west, check the coast, and all the old Death Eater lairs that we uncovered in the first wave, look for any indication as to where he has gone. Hagrid, I need you to start scouting Hogsmead and the surrounding areas for any trace of him or his followers."

Now he turned back to Deidra, a mixed look of pride and worry on his face, "Deidra, I need you to stay here and run the school for me while I'm gone. You're the only one strong enough to protect the students if something should happen. You will have absolute control, and I will make that clear to all the other teachers before I leave." 

The group was silent for a few moments before Severus stood up, his voice shaky, "And me, what do you need me for?"

Albus drew a shaky breath; this was the part he hadn't wanted to address. "Minerva, Hagrid, could you leave us please, I shall give you more precise instructions later." Both Minerva and Hagrid got up, nodded to Dumbledore and left. Dumbledore followed them to the door and closed it behind them. Turning around he took in the scene, Deidra, staring into the fire, and Severus staring at her. He didn't want to do this, but he needed both of them right now, and there was no way to avoid it.

"Severus, I need you to come with me, you and I both know that the Death Eaters are traveling like a herd, migrating from place to place. I need to know what Voldemort is telling them, and for that I need you. We will follow the Death Eaters, you and I. I shall make my excuses and we'll leave as soon as possible."

At this Deidra looked up, she understood now the expression she'd seen on her father's face, he'd known about them, and had not wanted to tell them that they had to be split apart again. Severus had to leave again, had to go back, this would be twice now she'd loose him to Voldemort and the Death Eaters, and at the thought of this she began to weep.

Severus couldn't restrain himself anymore, he didn't care what Albus saw or thought, and he strode quickly across the room and stood next to Deidra. She clutched his robes, and very gently he pulled her to her feet and encircled her with his arms. She cried into his chest and he held her tightly. Albus stood by and said nothing; he simply watched this tender display of affection.

Deidra sobbed, "twice, I've lost you twice to the Death Eaters twice now." She clutched Severus tightly as though if she held on long enough she could make him stay with her.

Severus smoothed her hair, laying soft kisses on it. "No, no, you're not loosing me, I just have to go back to help finish them off. Deidra, Deidra look at me." He forced her head up so she was looking into his eyes, "Voldemort will kill us all if we don't stop him, so we all have to do our part, it just so happens that at this point your part leaves you here, while mine takes me somewhere else."

"But if you're discovered, what if they kill you, I might not even see you again, what will I do then? How can you expect me to just go on without you." She was so over taken with her grief that she lost her balance. Luckily Severus still had a firm grip on her, and he gently lowered both of them to the floor. "Last night I was so happy, I thought I had you back, I thought this time we were going to do it right. I thought we were going to spend time together, not 'I love you,' then you leave me!" Spent from her outburst Deidra laid her head on his shoulder and cried in silence. 

Albus made a move to come closer, but Severus waved him off. He picked Deidra up an carried her out of the room and down the hall. Dumbledore sank into a chair and buried his face in his hands. He hadn't known it would cause her so much pain, Deidra had always been so strong, but then he should have known, even the strongest people get tired of being strong.

***************************************^******************************** 

Severus kicked open the door to Deidra's room shaking his head, _you should lock you door, you never know who could come in._ He laid her gently on the bed, pulling a blanket at the foot of the bed up to cover her. Sighing deeply he just stood there for a few moments, would he ever get a chance, perhaps when this was all over he'd have a chance, and this time he'd do it right.

Straightening he made for the door, but stopped midway there. Turning back toward the bed he brought his hand up to feel a lock of his hair. All at once an idea came to him. Striding over to Deidra's dresser he rifled through the drawers until he found what he was looking for, a pair of scissors. Bringing them to the back of his head, he lopped off one of his longer locks of hair. Setting that on the dresser he held up his left sleeve and ripped off part of the cuff.

Searching quickly he found in one of drawers a small empty pouch, he swiftly stuffed the lock of hair and the ripped cuff into the pouch and walked back to the bed. Deidra was sound asleep. Exhausted by the tumult of emotions that had over taken her. Carefully, so as not to wake her, he slipped the pouch into her palm. _Would that I could just stay here and watch over you, you need watching over, you know that? But I will go, go and do my part to protect you and everyone else._

Then he left, quietly closing the door behind him.

######################################^#################################

Dumbledore looked up when he heard the door open. Severus stood in the doorway, framed by the light of the hall torches. His face was grim set, but determined. "If we have to go we'd best go now." Nodding Dumbledore rose from his seat, and followed Severus out the door. 


	10. An Important Message to Deliver

****

An Important Message to Deliver

Deidra shifted in her sleep. She knew she ought to get up, but she didn't want to. she knew if she got up she'd have to face her situation. Without even opening her eyes she knew he was gone, they were both gone. Severus would have wanted to leave while she was still asleep. He would have wanted to spare both of them that extra pain.

But in a way that made it worse, for now, even though he'd only been gone a few hours, she was already finding it difficult to remember his face. These last few days had been like a wave that had washed over her, and now she was once again left with an empty calm.

It was only when she brought her hands up to try to cover her face and shut out the dreadful truth that she finally discovered the pouch Severus had left. She only noticed it when she felt the soft plop on her comforter. Looking down she recognized one of her jewelry pouches, but could not recall how it had gotten there. Picking it up, she turned it over and over in her hands, searching the vaults of her memory for something that might explain its presence in her bed.

Not being able to connect the pouch with anything, she gave up. Oddly, the bad was weighted, but not enough to be containing any of her jewelry. Seized by an idle curiosity, she opened the pouch and upended the contents into her palm. Out fell a lock of jet-black hair, and a piece of a frayed robe cuff.

Twisting the hair between her fingers, memories began flooding back, _thick black hair, the same as his eyes. Eyes that could see into your very soul, eyes that, with one sweep, knew not only who and what you were, but everything you'd ever been, and everything you ever would be. Midnight black, such a contrast to his pale lips. Lips that, when they touched her own, felt soft and warm. Lips that seemed to be her only true source of air. So that, when she was given the chance to breathe, she felt the need to gasp for more, to take in all that se could. _

Turning her attention to the frayed cuff, she clenched it in her fist; _she was clutching his robes, the soft, faded fabric was soft against her callused palms, and it easily absorbed her continuous flow of tears as she wept into his shoulder. She felt once again the firm arms holding her close; a firm haven created by his love and strength. _And then she saw it, saw his face clearly; a pale star radiating love and light, standing out against the black night sky of her closed eyelids.

Once again grief swelled in her, but this time she didn't cry, for tears might ruin this perfect vision.

###########################^#################################

Severus glared at the ceiling, _what sector of hell was this? He couldn't see her, couldn't speak to her, and couldn't send her an owl, he was even being advised not to think of her, for that might distract him from the task at hand._

Pushing back his sleeve he ran his fingers over the red blotch that had once been his dark mark. _Well, they could keep her away from him, refuse to let him speak to her, but they couldn't control his thoughts; his memories. He knew what Deidra Dumbledore meant to him, and what he meant to her. That red mark on his arm was physical proof of their love. A love strong enough to combat even the hatred and darkness of Voldemort himself._

His fingertip traced the edges of the mark, calling up the memory of other fingers that had done the same thing. _Her fingers, thin and delicate, traced the outline of the mark, making him shiver and ticklish at the same time, it had been exhilarating._

*******************************^*****************************

Staring down at the two empty chairs, Deidra knew she should sit in the center chair. She was headmistress, at least for the time being. But try as she might, that was still her father's chair, and she could not bring herself to sit in his chair. So, taking her usual place, she sat down next to the headmaster's chair, still a guest, still the headmaster's daughter, just the way she liked it.

Looking around, she noticed that not only were Albus and Severus's chairs empty, Minerva and Hagrid's were as well. _Father must have sent them on their way as well. _She shrugged, _well at least I have something to do now, Father had substitutes on call for almost every subject. But he'd yet to find a teacher qualified to teach transfiguration. _That was certainly something Deidra could do. Besides her short Hogwarts student career, she'd spent a great deal of one on one time with Minerva, and she had taught Deidra everything she knew about transfiguration, including the ability to transform herself.

So, finishing her eggs and toast, Deidra left the hall and headed for Minerva's office. Standing in front of the door, she whispered the castle's master password, "Every Flavor Beans," and opened the door, shaking her head. f _only father could come up with passwords like that._

Sitting down at Minerva's desk, she began looking through drawers. She was looking for some kind of record or lesson plan. Deidra had been a student once herself and she knew, if she asked the students what they'd been doing in class she'd get answers like, "Oh nothing," or "She was going to give us a free day," or "She was going to teach us how to turn our partners into African Tree Frogs." Deidra knew, because she and her friends had used the same excuses. No, she would have to come into that classroom informed and in control.

After several minutes of searching she found what she was looking for. In the bottom right drawer was a daily log of lessons, showing that yesterday the first years had learned how to turn beetles into buttons, and the fifth years had learned how to turn hares into hat racks. And on today's date, tentatively sketched in pencil were the words 'Second years- porcupines to pincushions (in classroom closet)' and 'sixth years- snakes to sticks (see Hagrid for garden snakes)'

Deidra chuckled at this, she thought very unlikely that Hagrid would store anything as harmless as garden snakes. However, her first class was not until third period. So she had ample time to get down to Hagrid's cottage and back.

Taking the log with her, she left Minerva's office and headed down to the front of the castle, stopping by her room to get her cloak.

Pulling up her hood to shelter herself against the bitter September wind, she made her way down the castle steps an across the grounds. She walked around the lake and along the edge of the forest, her mind deep in thought.

Soon enough Hagrid's cottage came into view, but there were no lights on and no smoke coming from the chimney. Still she kept going, _maybe he's in the back._ Reaching the cottage, she knocked on the door. After waiting a few moments she decided to go around the back and look around.

But just as she rounded the first corner she heard a great commotion coming from the bushes directly to her left. Swinging around she saw a large form struggling to get out of the bushes. Deidra flattened herself against the wall in an attempt to conceal herself from whoever it was that was coming out of the bushes. Moments later, she realized she'd had nothing to worry about, for the figure that was now attempting to free himself from the last remains of his brawl with the bushes, was none other than Hagrid himself.

Releasing the breaths she'd been desperately trying to retrain, Deidra tentatively stepped out of the shelter of the shadows. She did not wish to alarm Hagrid, for, though he would never intentionally hurt her, if Hagrid though he was being attacked, he would be quick to defend himself. Gingerly she reached out and tapped his shoulder as gently as she could.

Hagrid whirled around, his eyes dangerously alert. Deidra flattened herself back against the wall, trying to control her haphazard breathing caused by the panic rapidly swelling in her chest. "Hagrid it's me," she whispered hoarsely 

"D'dra, s'hat you?" His whole body seemed to release the tension he'd been with holding at the possibility of the ambush he'd been fearing.

Easing out of the shadows once more, Deidra let her shoulders drop in relief. "Yes Hagrid, it's me."

A new different panic filled Hagrid's eyes now. Using his over-large hands, he began to push her back towards the front of the cottage, and the path back to the castle. "Wha'er ya doin uot ere. Ya shouldn' be uotsoid, no un should. Get righ back ta the casle, n make sure no un else is uotsoid! (for those of you that have trouble reading accents, this is what Hagrid really said, "What are you doing out here. You shouldn't be outside, no one should. Get right back to the castle, and make sure no one else is outside!")

Deidra detected an urgency and fear in Hagrid's voice which she didn't like. "Hag- Hagrid, what's wrong? What have you found? Why do we all need to be inside? HAGRID! I demand, as headmistress of this school, that you tell me what's going on!"

Hagrid did not look at her, but pushed her forward again, "Oi'll tell ya when we're insoid. N noh before." (translation, "I'll tell you when we're inside. And not before.") And so, they hurried back to the castle in silence.

################################^############################

Closing the great main doors behind her, Deidra turned to face Hagrid. "Now Hagrid, you will tell me right now what had got you in such a fright."

Nervously, Hagrid glanced around, then leaned in so only Deidra could hear him. "Member ow eadmaster Dumbledore asked me ta stat searchin Ogsmead n the surroundin area. Well Oi stared this mornin n oi was up round the shriken shack. N Oi sees a glow comin from on uh the widous. So Oi went up ta get a closer look. Id was IM D'dra, tha Dak Lord imself, oll by imself e was, n oi eard im talkin. E as saying that e's gonna go afer Arry, n, n, e said e was gonna get yer father. E knew D'dra, e knew yer father was gone." (translation- "Remember how headmaster Dumbledore asked me to start searching Hogsmead and the surrounding area. Well I started this morning and I was up around the shrieking shack. And I sees a glow coming from one of the windows. So I went up to get a closer look. It was HIM Deidra, the Dark Lord himself, all by himself he was, and I heard him talking. He was saying that he's gonna go after Harry, and, and, he said, he was gonna get your father. He knew Deidra, he knew your father was gone.")

Deidra slumped against the back of the door. "Hagrid, would you be so good as to begin channeling the students back to their common rooms?" Hagrid nodded, turned, and walked away. Waiting till he had rounded the corner, she slowly slid to the floor, laying her forehead on her knees. She heard a mocking voice in her head, _what will you do now? Now, when there's no daddy to protect you, to save you. Now, when there's no Minerva try and shelter you…No Severus to comfort you, to love you. The Dark Lord's coming, and it's just you and him. This is your test. And you will fail. People will die, innocent lives will be lost, and your father, Severus, and everyone else will know it's your fault._

"Excuse me. Are you alright?" The voice of a young man broke the chain of ugly thoughts that had been running through her head. Looking up, Deidra saw the slight figure of a young man with jet-black hair. For a moment it seemed as though she were looking at a younger Severus. Indeed, he looked exactly like Severus on the first day they'd meet. A thin, pale boy, with tousled black hair, an worn school robes that hug loose on his body. And, for a moment she wanted nothing more than to pull this boy to her and take comfort in the arms that would encircle her.

But then green eyes flashed and she remembered that this boy was, in fact, not Severus, but a student. Clearing her eyes, she looked at the boy in front of her, and realized that the was actually Harry Potter. He shifted uncomfortably under her gaze, and, after several minutes of uneasy silence repeated, "are you alright?"

Standing slowly, Deidra looked around. Harry stood in front of her, just a few inches shorter. Deidra's mind was racing now, she had to come up with a plan. Then a thought struck her, no matter what else she was planning to do, there was one thing that had to be done first. And for that she would need the help of the young man in front of her.

********************************^****************************

Harry was beginning to feel quite lost. Dumbledore's daughter, (he could never remember her name) seemed to be simply staring off into space. He'd asked three times, "are you alright." But she'd given no response, and almost no sign of recognition.

Now Harry too was beginning to recede into his own thoughts. And, as he did so, he became less and less aware of what was going on around him. So, it came as a great shock when two hands all but shot out of nowhere, and gripped him, almost violently, on the shoulders. Shocked back into full awareness, he became aware of Deidra's face looming in front of him, and, he vaguely connected her arms to the hands gripping his shoulders.

"Harry, Harry, listen to me. I need you to help me with something, do you think you can do that?"

Harry looked at her dumbly, it took a few seconds for the meaning of her words to sink in. But when they did, he swelled with a sense of pride and foreboding. Pride, because this wise, powerful adult was asking his help. Foreboding, because there was something in this woman's voice that scared him. And her eyes seemed to Harry, to have the look of a trapped animal, whose predators were closing in. But he swallowed his fears and doubts, and somehow managed to acknowledge her question with a faint nod.

"Good," Deidra nodded her head with an air of nervous approval. "Follow me please." And with that she was off, walking at a pace so brisk that, even with his long legs, Harry had trouble keeping up with. 

################################^############################

Severus apporated into the center of the flat living room. Dumbledore stood off to the side, his arms crossed with an air of resigned patience. Shaking his head, Severus began moving in the direction of his bedroom, he called over his shoulder, "I don't like it, something's not right."

Pulling himself off the wall where he'd been leaning, Albus followed Severus across the room and into Severus's room. "What's not right Severus? What happened?"

Rummaging around in a drawer, Severus replied in short, incomplete sentences, "He…announced…next few raids…doesn't fit…not what he normally does…doesn't make sense…I don't like it."

Albus, trying to follow both Severus's words, and what he was doing in the drawer, was soon lost. He knew Severus was doing this on purpose, he wanted Albus to leave him alone. But Albus was not so easily dissuaded. Shrugging his shoulders with an air of acceptance, he sat down on the edge of Severus's bed and waited quietly for him to finish.

__

*******************************^*****************************

Severus was silently cursing himself for his negligence. _What was I thinking. 'I'll just put it in a drawer, that way, no one will find it, and I'll know exactly where it is. _Well he didn't know where it was, and he wanted it, now.

Slamming the drawer shut in frustration, he turned around and began scanning the floor. It was only when his eyes fell on a pair of black, shinny boots, that he realized he was not alone. Looking up, he saw Dumbledore sitting calmly on the edge of his bed, his hands cupped in his lap. And in his cupped hands lay the pouch that Severus had been so laboriously searching for.

Seized by a sudden rage, Severus strode across the room toward Dumbledore, his eyes fixed on the pouch. But just as he reached out to grasp the pouch, Dumbledore's hands closed around it.

Severus drew back, his teeth clenched in anger. "That belongs to me, if you don't mind." He hissed. 

"Oh this," Dumbledore waved the bag casually in the air, "you were looking for this? That's funny, I was looking for something too, information. Perhaps, if you help me with what I'm looking for, I may be able to help you." Dumbledore waved the pouch again, like an adult waving bait before a difficult child, his face a mask of innocent curiosity. 

Severus thought he was going to explode, Albus was toying with him, and he knew it. He tried again, but this time in a defeated tone, "please, would you please return my pouch to me."

Dumbledore stood, face to face with Severus, his look of innocence replaced with one of questions and concern. "What is it in this pouch that you want so much Severus?" The headmaster's tone was stern, but full of compassion.

Severus slumped back against the chest, truly feeling defeated now, "you would not understand, or approve." He muttered, refusing to meet Dumbledore's eyes.

"Perhaps not," Dumbledore shrugged, "but if you tell me, it might help me better understand your situation, Severus?"

Sighing, Severus walked over to the window, he could not look at Albus if he was to tell him the truth. "The first day I saw your daughter, I fell in love with her."

Had Severus not been looking out the window, he would have seen the sad smile on Albus's face as he gently shook his head. He'd heard this story before, only now, he was hearing it from the other side.

"Oh course, I never thought she'd ever even look in my direction. I mean, she was your daughter, for one, and I was no one. And for another, she was the brilliant, beautiful Gryffindor, and I was a stupid, greasy Slytherin. There was about as much chance of her returning my affections as there was of her returning those of Voldemort himself. I knew that right from the start, but still, I couldn't think of anyone else. My Slytherin buddies tried their best to distract me. They tried to fix me up with a various number of girls, boys, and even a goat, I think. I don't know, I'd had quite a bit of mead by then, it's hard to remember. But nothing worked, I was fair obsessed. Which gets us to where that pouch comes into play."

"Right before the end of the school year I was in utter despair. Deidra would leave for the summer, and I would not see her. What was worse, I had nothing to remind me of her. No picture, no discarded item, I wasn't even able to lay hand on one of her used tissues. So, during the last week of school, I resolved to sneak up to her dorm room, to see if I could find anything that would suit my purpose. Well, the very last night before we were all to leave, I finally worked up my nerve. After the feast, I wen t and hid behind a tapestry right by the entrance to Gryffindor tower and waited for everyone to enter and go to bed. I think it was about 12:30; when I finally came out of my hiding spot. After hearing over a hundred Gryffindors say it , I knew the password cold, "Alabastrie," I think it was. And it was dark enough that the Fat Lady didn't notice I wasn't a Gryffindor. So I was able to easily slip inside, and up to Deidra's dormitory. Once I was inside, it took me a few moments to figure out which bed was hers. But when I did, I didn't go to her trunk, as I'd planned. Instead, I was seized with a sickening desire to look at her on last time. So, I walked to the head of the bed and drew back the curtain. Oh! My heart turned at the sight of her, she was so radiant. And then I did something I never dreamed I'd be able to do, I reached out, and I touched her hair. At that moment, I realized how much I loved her hair, it was thick, and silky. This was back when her hair was lighter, more auburn."

Severus's eyes were closed, his sight lost in remembering one of the most treasured moments in his past. "I remember, her hair was spread out all over the pillow, and I brought my face down, so that my cheek was resting on the bit of her hair that lay near the edge of the pillow. Resting my head there, I looked over and watched her, breathing deep with sleep, she was so perfect. I knew what it was that I wanted to take then, and, searching over on her night stand, I found the scissors."

"I was careful to only cut a small lock off the end, and I made sure that I replaced the scissors exactly as they had been on the night stand. Putting the hair in my pocket, I made to leave. But as I approached the door, my eye was caught by a bunch of cloaks on the adjoining wall. Walking over to them, I ran my hand over each one. I knew right away which one was hers. It was that heavy velvet one, she still wears it, I think. Anyway, as I ran my hands along it, I felt a part of the hem coming loose. So, I just ripped it off, and shoved it in my pocket along with the hair. Then, with one last look at her bed. I left. And ever since then, I've kept both in the pouch, and the pouch near my heart."

Dumbledore walked over and put his hand on Severus's shoulder, "I neither misunderstand, or disapprove. You were and are, a man truly in love. And I have been a fool to try to make you be anything else."

At these words, Severus turned and looked at Dumbledore, who, in turn, held out the pouch to him. 

###############################^#############################

Harry had waited while Deidra had hurriedly scribbled something on a thin piece of parchment, and sealed it with a plain seal. Now he was following her up to, what he now realized, was the owlry. As they climbed the last few steps, Deidra opened the door and let Harry enter first, following herself, and closing the door quietly behind her.

Harry immediately went to Hedwig, who flew onto his arm and nipped the finger he offered affectionately. "Is this your owl Harry?" Deidra had come up behind him so stealthily that he hadn't even heard her, which was surprising, considering most of the floor was covered with dry straw and old owl droppings.

Once again hearing that note of foreboding in her voice, Harry turned to face her, holding Hedwig closer for comfort. "Yes, this my owl, her name is Hedwig."

"Oh, she's beautiful Harry," Deidra reached out a tentative hand to stroke the owl's snowy white feathers. Somewhat to Harry's surprise, Hedwig responded by nuzzling against Deidra's outstretched finger. "Harry, do you think I could borrow Hedwig, just to send one message?"

Harry shrugged, "sure, but why don't you just use one of the school owls?"

Deidra hesitated at this, then whispered, "because I don't want anyone to know that the letter's coming from Hogwarts."

Harry shrugged again, "fine, where do you want me to send it?" He held his hand out for the letter, but Deidra held it back.

"If you don't mind Harry, I'd prefer to send it myself. In fact, if you wouldn't mind, I'd like you to wait outside while I send it." Deidra was clutching the letter to her breast now, and Harry got the idea that this was a fair important letter. So, shrugging yet again, because he could think of no other response, he extended the arm that held Hedwig out toward Deidra. Hedwig glided from Harry's arm to Deidra's. Giving Hedwig's head one final stroke, he turned and left.

*********************************^***************************

Deidra waited till she heard the door close, then turned back to Hedwig. "I need you, to take this to Severus Snape," she said holding out the letter. Hedwig too seemed to understand the seriousness of the situation, and nodding her head gravely, extended her leg. Deidra brought the letter to her lips and planted a soft kiss just above where she had written Severus's name. Then, after she had tied the letter to Hedwig's leg, she walked with her over to the window and extended her arm.

Hedwig gracefully glided off Deidra's arm and into the night. Deidra watched the small white form disappear into the darkness, and silently prayed that her message would not arrive too late. 

################################^############################

P.S.

To Kyla, a.k.a Deathtooth,

Note:

He was not actually fixed up with a goat, he was just a little drunk at the time, and, well, his memory got a little blurred. 

It was just a little crude humor, take a joke for gods sake! 


	11. Oblivious Betrayal

****

Oblivious Betrayal 

The two men had been talking for some time when they heard a soft tapping coming form the window. Dumbledore was the first to spot the source of the sound and walk over to the window and open it. Moments later, a snowy white owl glided into the room to perch next to Severus on the bed.

Somberly, the owl stretched out its leg toward Severus, who recognized, unmistakably, the delicate scrawl on the letter front. With shaky hands, Severus detached the letter from the owl's leg, and carefully broke the seal on the back. His eyes scanned the contents for several minutes in silence. When he had finished, a look of intense anger came over his face, and, in one violent motion, he had crushed the paper in his immense fists. The movement startled Hedwig, who rose clumsily in the air to land again on the dresser. 

A loud groan escaped Severus's lips as he let the crumpled wad fall to the floor. Throwing himself back on the bed, he covered his face with his hands. "Oh! I'm such a fool, why didn't I see it before. It's all my fault!" And with that, he slammed his fists down on the bed, causing it to shake violently. 

Dumbledore, also somewhat alarmed by Severus's sudden movements, stood and slowly approached him. Standing next to the bed, he caught Severus's fist just as it was about to come down on the mattress again. Jolted by the block of his strike, Severus lifted his head to look at Dumbledore. "Severus, what is it? What's in that letter that has you so upset."

Severus sat back up, burying his head in his hands in a gesture of despair. Another muffled groan escaped his lips; "it all makes sense now. The reason the Death Eater raids are so random is that they aren't to accomplish anything beyond drawing attention to us. He wanted the full force of the ministry to be used on stopping our raids while he… while he…" But Severus's voice trailed off, as he could not bare to finish the sentence.

But Dumbledore finished it for him, "while he quietly, and cleanly wipes out me, Harry, and Deidra." At this, Severus's head shot up, his eyes wide with horror.

"Deidra?! Why would he hurt Deidra, he hates you, and Harry, but why Deidra!" These last words came out as a whimper.

"Because Severus, she is the most powerful wizard in Britain, after myself. And like Harry, she too is, or was, an immune victim to one of Voldemort's murders." Dumbledore had sat down on the bed next to Severus, and all at once he looked very worn and tired. 

Severus looked over at Dumbledore, his voice shaky, "but, but if she's an immune victim, then, then he can't kill her, she'll be safe."

Albus shook his head sadly, _what a fool he'd been, to leave his only child alone in the hands of the enemy. Severus was right, the Death Eater activity was just bait. Now Deidra was trapped, and he did not know if he could reach her in time, if anyone could. _"No Severus, when Voldemort used Harry's blood to revive himself, he rendered all immunities useless. Deidra is just as helpless as Harry should Voldemort get hold of her."

Severus felt stricken, he'd left Deidra alone, now she was on her own, and if they didn't do something soon, that school was like to become her grave. Yet, he didn't know what they could do, what any one wizard could do against Voldemort.

Both men were caught in a dreadful mental limbo. Each horrified at the thought of Deidra sitting at Hogwarts, trapped like a rat, waiting for Voldemort to strike. Yet neither could think of any way to protect her. 

Once again, seized by an impulse, Severus bolted off the bed and over to the dresser. He furiously began wrenching open drawers, (once again unsettling Hedwig, who, this time, opted to fly into the other room to wait for the men to finish whatever it was that they were doing.) And throwing the contents onto the bed. Dumbledore moved out of the way of the volley of robes and pants. 

"Severus, what in God's name are you doing?" Dumbledore's eyes followed the flow of clothing as Severus continued emptying his drawers.

"I'm packing," Severus said gruffly. "I don't care if we can't do anything to stop Voldemort, I'm not going to sit here and pretend like nothing's happening! I'm going back there to do what I can, you do as you like." But when he turned around, Albus had already left the room, and by the sound of it, he was doing the same in his room as Severus was here. 

A few moments later Dumbledore reappeared in the doorway, a small sack slung over his shoulder. "Well, come on boy, if you want to get back and help we have to move fast."

Severus smirked, but continued packing his things. If they wouldn't be running the risk of being discovered, he'd have left all the excess and just left right then and there. All that mattered right now was getting back to Deidra. 

#################################^###########################

Deidra paced the, now empty halls of Hogwarts. All the students had been moved to the vaults below the dungeons, and most of the teachers with them. Minerva had not returned yet, and there had been no reply from Severus or her father. So, she was on her own then. She had to have a plan, as futile as it might be, Deidra needed to have some set plan of action to make her feel better. Which was why she was now pacing the halls, trying to recall all that her father and Minerva had taught her about dark forces and their counters. 

She desperately reached for something that she had been taught that might prove useful in fighting Voldemort. But this search soon proved in vain. There was no spell, or potion, or charm that she'd ever been taught that could stand up to the likes of a dark magic like Voldemort's. Leaving that avenue of thought, she turned to what she knew of Voldemort himself. She felt like a blacksmith, searching for chinks in what seemed like, an invincible set of armor. 

What did she know about his past? He'd been an only child, and a half-breed. He'd murdered his parents and shortly after begun to gather his dark legion. He'd met his down fall the first time in Harry Potter, because of the immunity his mother's love had given him. But that immunity was now worthless, because it had been Harry's blood that had helped Voldemort to return. And he used raw force in almost all his magic.

That was it! Raw force! Voldemort's came mostly from his raw force, because he was, at best, a mediocre wizard. But, by funneling the immense power of his hate, he became an indestructible force. So if she used an opposite raw force, she could counter, perhaps even destroy, Voldemort. 

But there was only one problem, Voldemort directed the power of his raw force at the destruction of actual people, her father, the Potter boy, his parents, and the countless other victims of his rage. So the raw force she would have to use to defeat him must come from an opposite emotion directed at him. In other words, she had to find some way to absolutely love Voldemort in order to destroy him, because he would be using his hate of her to destroy her. 

This put a snag in Deidra's idea, there was no way in the world that she could make herself even considered liking Voldemort. He had killed her mother, along with countless others. He had ruined lives aplenty, and he had severed her from her only love. She hated Voldemort, probably even more than he hated her. But, perhaps it did not have to be her who made the kill. Anyone could use raw forces, the only difficulty was in finding someone who loved Voldemort enough to channel a raw force powerful enough to combat his hate. 

Deidra racked her brains long and hard to find someone who would love Voldemort. In the end there was only one person in the entire world who she could think of that might be able to love a man so truly evil as Voldemort. There was only one problem, that person was dead. She had died at the hand of Voldemort long ago, indeed, she had been the first. Yes, the only person who could love pure evil, would be the one who breeds it in the first place. 

And with that Deidra rushed to the library, she needed to find a book on binding.

*********************************^***************************

Lucious dared a look into the cold, red eyes of his lord as he handed him the pouch he had found on the ground on his way back to the Shrieking Shack. "And you are sure, you are sure that it is Severus's, because if it is not, you will suffer richly." Voldemort was fingering the lock of hair that he had found in the pouch.

"I have never failed you before my lord. I can assure you, it is Severus's." Lucious bowed his head while he spoke, he did not wish to invoke Voldemort's anger, _save it for Snape, that turncoat! _At that thought Lucious's lips curled into a vindictive sneer.

"Why are you sneering, Lucious?" Voldemort's eyes flashed dangerously, he could sense deceit like a bloodhound, and at Malfoy's sneer, his senses flared.

"I was only thinking of how grand it will be when you finally have your triumph over Dumbledore and his lot." Lucious was smooth, his contempt for Snape had almost bubbled to the surface in the shadow of his imminent downfall. But he was not in the clear yet, for Voldemort's face still maintained the look of a police dog who knows his hunt is almost at an end.

Voldemort's now, massive fist, crashed down, stopping barely an inch from Malfoy's left shoulder. "I will not tolerate such talk in my presence Lucious! NEVER let me hear speak like that again!"

Lucious cringed on the floor. He tried to stutter an apology, but was cut short by a gesture from his lord. Voldemort rose and swept past the now cowering figure of Lucious and walked to the window. "I will not fail this time Lucious, I will not stand for it. Since we have the upper hand, the only way we might fail is if we become careless, over-confident. This must not happen Lucious, which is why, I will hear no such talk in my presence."

Lucious knew, just because Voldemort was turned away from him, didn't mean he couldn't see him. So at the end of Voldemort's speech, Lucious inclined his head, and began to back out of the room. But, just before he'd reached the door, Voldemort signaled him forward.

"Yes, my lord," Lucious said in a guarded voice.

"How forgetful you are, Malfoy," the dark lord said, still not turning his head. "We have only a few hours, and there is a potion yet to be brewed."

"Yes my lord," Lucious bowed again and once again began to back out. "I shall hasten to do your biding." And with that he left.

Voldemort stood still looking out on Hogsmead for a few moments after he heard the catch of the door. Then he turned and watched the light play on the lock of hair he still held in his hand. "Yes, yes, hurry, we have fourteen years of retribution to collect. Ah Severus, I knew you would be of use, one way, or another." And with that, the Dark Lord let out a high pitched evil laugh and crushed the lock between his thin fingers.

################################^############################

Deidra had been sifting through books in every section of the library all afternoon. She had almost given up hope when, in the last isle of the restriction she tripped over an old faded book that's binding was crumbling. She tried to turn it sideways to read the title, but the leather was so faded, that she couldn't read. So she opened the cover and flipped to the third page. Her heart gave a leap when she read the large bold words, "MELDINGS, COMBINATIONS, AND BINDINGS." 

This was what she needed, and, plopping down right there in the middle of the isle and began thumbing through the pages. She read things that, under normal circumstances, would have held her focus for hours. But they were not what she needed, and so, she moved on. 

It took her about a half-hour before she found the chapter she needed. Her eyes traveled greedily down page after page, consuming every piece of knowledge she could. 

When, at last she knew what she had to do, she snapped the book shut triumphantly. It was very risky, but in her heart, Deidra knew it was the only way. Now, all she had to do was figure out a way to lure him out there. There had to be away. Deidra would just have to appeal to a certain side of him. Whether it was his ego, or his cruel nature, she wasn't sure, but there had to be away. 

Standing, Deidra stretched her muscles that had become very cramped from hours of crouching and squatting. As she rolled her neck, something out the window caught her eye. Coming closer, she could make out the approaching shapes of two men. 

At least she thought they were two men. All that she could really see were two figures. One draped from head to toe in a royal purple cloak with a wide hood that made it impossible to see its face. And the other, the other was draped in all black and wore no hood at all, though the wind was blowing fiercely that morning. 

Deidra opened the window and strained out to see the two figures clearer. What she saw now made her heart leap. For, as they approached the castle, Deidra could see that the figure clad in all black was Severus! That meant that the other figure had to be her father, she should have recognized his cape before that. They were back! Severus was here, her father was here, and together, they would find some way of defeating Voldemort and keeping the school and its occupants safe. 

Rushing out of the library, Deidra all but flew down the numerous staircases as she made her way to the front entrance. When she reached the door, without any hesitation, she threw the doors wide. The two men made their way up the steps and inside, Severus first and Dumbledore behind, closing and bolting the door behind him. 

Deidra threw herself into Severus's arms and buried her face in his shoulder. His arms encircled her, rather tighter than usual, but Deidra didn't mind all she wanted was for him to never let her go. "I didn't think you'd be able to get her in time," she whispered into his shoulder. "But I'm glad you did."

"And so am I," said Severus. But when he spoke, he didn't sound like Severus, his voice was higher than usual, and his tone seemed thin and reedy, not at all like the thick, deep throated growling sound that usually accompanied Severus's speech. 

His arms were murderously tight now, and he'd begun to laugh, and as he laughed, his voice got higher and higher. Deidra drew her head back to look at his face, and what she saw almost made her die right then and there. Before her eyes, Severus's face began to meld and change, change into the face of… Voldemort.

Deidra tried to scream, but the figure that she had taken to be her father had come around behind her, and now clamped his hand around her mouth. Voldemort was laughing hysterically now, his fingers biting into the flesh of Deidra's arms as he held her prisoner. "To think," he said in between shrieks of laughter. "To think, that one of the greatest wizards in all Great Britain could be fooled by a mere student's trick!" 

He looked straight into her eyes then, his cold with a murderous glint. "It just proves that you're a sentimental, trusting fool. Just like your father. Yes, thanks to the wonderful mishaps of heredity, by the end of the day I shall be rid of you both."

Struggling furiously, Deidra tried to free herself from the two pairs of hands that now had a death grip on her. More out of frustration than anything else, she bit down as hard as she could on the hand that silenced her mouth. Momentarily it with drew, and Deidra heard a yowl of pain from behind her hand. Seizing her moment of opportunity she gathered all the hate, disgust, and contempt she held for the man before her in the back of her throat. And letting go of her self-control, she spit straight into his face.

Voldemort drew back and dragged the sleeve of his rove across his face to remove her spittle. "Now, now Deidra, that wasn't nice." Within moments he'd pulled out his wand and waved it before her, shouting "Bindestra!" 

As he lowered his wand, steel bands clamped Deidra's limbs to her body. She fell to the floor, unable to keep her balance. "Lucious, you'd best prepare for our other guests and leave Miss Dumbledore to me." He looked down at Deidra his filled with a shadowy foreboding look. 

He raised his wand once more, "Enavate!" Deidra was upright again, floating a few inches above the ground.

"Are you going to kill me," she asked, trying to sound brave and defiant as she knew her father would have done.

Voldemort laughed again, "why of course my dear, that was the point of all this. I sick to death of your father and his meddling manner. So, I shall kill you first, that will bring him to his knees, and then he'll be ripe for the slaying." Voldemort snapped his head back to look straight at Deidra, "but surely a woman as educated and wise as you are said to be would have known that."

Deidra shuddered, trying to keep her temper in check. She still had her plan; she could still use it, if she kept her head. "Kill me then, all I ask is one thing." She tried to sound more compliant; to pull this off she must be a superb actor.

Voldemort stroked his wand lovingly, "I'm not inclined to grant requests, but I will hear yours, it is only fair."

"All I ask," Deidra swallowed the lumps that were rapidly forming in her throat, "is that you don't kill me in here, kill me in a proper place."

"And what would you consider a proper place?" Voldemort sneered; he was tiring of the insolent young woman who thought herself his equal.

"At your parents grave." She looked him straight in the eye, now she had to put the finishing touches on this masquerade. "So that when my body is found they'll know, they'll know who killed them and me."

"Such poetic justice for our little heroine, our little martyr." Voldemort hissed and spat on the floor. "Very well, I shall do you this last service, not that it will do anything for your cause. But, because no matter how you die, you do me a great service, I shall do this for you."

He walked back over to the doors, unbolted them, and opened one. He jerked his wand toward the outside and Deidra's body responded by moving towards him. He walked down the steps and along the path, heading for the forest and the outskirts of the village, Deidra's body following behind. Stretching his arms Voldemort looked around at their surroundings. "Ah! What a day to die."

Deidra remained silent; she must play the helpless victim to make this work. _He'll pay soon enough, _she thought, and silently began going over what it was she had to do. 


	12. The Joining of Two Souls

****

The Joining of Two Souls

Rather than waste time with flying, Albus and Severus decided it would be quicker, in the long run, to apparate right outside the school grounds and walk the rest of the way in. So it was that they found themselves walking through the Forbidden Forest near 9:00 that evening. Severus was so bent on getting back to the school and Deidra, that he was oblivious to everything else. Dumbledore however, was very alert to their surroundings. He could sense something was wrong. He felt something almost like a pulse that seemed to be generating from the school. 

Now Dumbledore, like every other headmaster of Hogwarts, had a spell that bound him to the school, so that he could see and hear all that went on. But right now the pulse was rather small, and he too was preoccupied, so the pulse soon slipped to the back of his sub conscience registration. He was more concerned at the moment, with how Voldemort had managed to return to Hogsmead without anyone, or anything noticing. 

********************************^****************************

Had either man not been so engrossed in his own thoughts, they would have seen the two figures to their far left traveling in the opposite direction. But because it was so dark, and both men were very preoccupied, neither noticed Voldemort or Deidra. However, due to the same reasons, Voldemort didn't notice them either. So, just as two ships in the night, the two pair past each other without any recognition.

When Voldemort and Deidra had cleared the trees, he turned and looked around. They had reached the ends of the grounds, so it was possible to apparate from here. Taking a few steps closer, his cheek was barely inches from Deidra's. He hissed in her ear, "I'm going to apparate us now, if you try any tricks, or draw any attention, I kill you on the spot, is that clear?" Deidra nodded meekly.

Grabbing the sleeve of Deidra's robe, he waved his wand and muttered some incomprehensible words. A blaze of white light flashed in front of Deidra's eyes and then it was done. She looked around to find herself surrounded by tombstones and flowers. She swallowed hard, her eyes scanning the numerous markers to find the one she needed. 

Within a few moments of searching she spied it. A massive square slab of marble residing under the leaves of a gigantic oak. When Voldemort shoved her from behind, she didn't fight it, but rather, concentrated on directing her fall so that she landed on top of the actual grave.

This was the moment of truth, if she was going to do it, she would have to do it now. Keeping her back to Voldemort, she braced her hands on the ground where, six feet under, the body would be laying. This was going to be very difficult, for she didn't have her wand. Though it was entirely possible to do magic without a wand, and she had learned how many years ago, it was always much more difficult. The purpose of a wand was to channel the power within; it gave the magic structure and direction. To call magic up on it's own, without any sort of conductor, took a great deal more strength and concentration. Deidra wasn't even sure she'd be able to do it. She hadn't practiced none wand magic in many years, and she was tired as it was, but it was her only chance. So, bowing her head, she began whispering the words that she had memorized earlier that day. "Alymorha, revivium, deceases, bindestra, alymorha, mea, se tu." 

Suddenly a pillar of golden light burst from the ground where Deidra knelt, shooting straight up, infinitely heaven wards. Deidra stood in the center of beam, screaming from the pain that she was experiencing. It felt as though every last nerve and cell in her body were being split in two, the pain grew so intense that she feared she might pass out.

Voldemort, who hadn't seen what Deidra was doing, was knocked off balance by the sudden burst of light. Shading his eyes, he looked at Deidra, her whole body seemed to be changing, and yet it wasn't. All at once, she reminded him of someone he hadn't seen in years, and as this realization dawned on him, he could no longer bare to look at the woman standing in front of him.

###############################^#############################

By the time Severus and Albus reached the front steps of Hogwarts, it was near 11:00 at night. They were both quite surprised to find the front entrance open. "What would make Deidra leave the front entrance wide open if she knew Voldemort was coming, even if she knew we were coming?" Severus asked as he looked around the front hall. 

There was an eerie silence to the castle that neither man liked, the absense of life was profound. There were no children to be heard anywhere, no teachers scolding, no feet pounding on stone, no peeves' taunts. One would think that the castle had been empty for years. "Perhaps, it was not Deidra who left the door open. Wands out Severus, I think I hear someone coming." Both men drew their wands from the folds of their robes and backed into the shadows cast by the tourch light. 

Sure enough, within a few moments a man could be heard staggering through the halls, he was swearing and talking to himself. It only took a few moments for Severus to place the man's voice, and when he did he grew enraged. Catching Dumbledore's eye he mouthed the word "Lucious!" Dumbledore only nodded and returned to watching the staircase where he predicted Lucious would come from. 

As he drew nearer, his words became clearer. "Where the hell are they, she couldn't had time to evacuate all of them and get them out of range, impossible. Damn!" He was decendig the stair case now, and Severus took up a crouch position like a tiger about to spring.

Lucious decended the stairs and came around the corner. When he did Severus jumped at him and nocked him to the ground. He wanted ever so badly to choke the man right then and there. But Dumbledore's steady hand pulled him back. Using his wand, Albus pinned Lucious to the wall. Though his movements were calm, his eyes were filled with a cold, violent anger. 

"What are you doing here, Lucious?" Dumbledore stood before Lucious in a relaxed position with his wand casually pointed at Lucious's heart. Lucious struggled to get free, but Dumbledore's bonds held him tight. 

"Where did you hide them all Dumbledore, I've been unable to find a single person other than your daughter in this entire god forsaken school!" At the mention of his daughter, Dumbledore's jaw tightened, and Severus came of the wall where he'd been lounging with a start. 

"Where did you see my daughter Lucious?"Dumbledore had stepped closer now, so that his wand actually was on Lucious's heart.

Lucious sneered evilly. "Oh her, she let us in, that is, thanks to you my dear Severus." 

Severus lunged at Lucious again, knocking Dumbledore's wand out of the way. Clutching his robe collar, Severus snarled, "what are you talking about, you cringing worm!"

Sniggering, Lucious looked Severus directly in the eye, "I mean that little love token you gave your darling before you left. She went for a walk this morning, and she dropped it by accident. Well, I too happened to be out for a little stroll and happened to come across it. So I brought it back to my master, being the FAITHFUL one and all. Well, you know how simple a Polyjuice Potion is to brew if you have the right ingredients. That dauft little hussy, she actually thought my master was you, let us right in!"

Severus yelled in anger an raised his hand to wound Lucious just as hard as he'd just wounded him. But before he could deliever his blow Albus stopped him, "Severus, no! That will do us no good right now."

Severus began to lower his fist, murder was in his eyes. "That's right, you be a good boy and do what daddy says, or isn't he daddy yet?" Lucious mocked harshly.

Again Severus's temper got the better of him and his fist flew out to land barely an inch away from Lucious's face. He stepped back to the shadows and eyed Lucious like the shopkeeper who's just caught the man who's been stealing from him, but he said nothing more.

Dumbledore came back to stand in front of Lucious, he wasn't quite finished with him yet. "What did you do to her?" Dumbledore's eyes looked even more venemous than Severus's at that moment.

Lucious raised his shoulders as much as he could to indicate that he didn't know. "When we had her, the master sent me off to find where everyone else was hiding, he said he would take care of her. I thought I heard them say something about the place where his first victims were buried, or something like that, but I didn't hear anything else."

Albus and Severus exchanged a look, they both knew what Lucious was talking about. The place where his first victims were buried, the graveyard where Voldemort's parents were buried.

"Why do you think he took her there?" Severus asked, his raged replaced by apprehension.

"I don't know Severus, but I don't think there's much we can do about it." Albus looked away from the other men, a sorrow filled his voice that was surprising to both men. 

********************************^**************************** 

Voldemort crouched on the ground hiding his face, not daring to look. "What have you done!" He roared, trying to mask his uneasiness at what had just happened.

"Tom, Tom why are you speaking to me like that, you know I don't like that." The voice that responded to Voldemorts anger was not Deidra's but another woman's, one who Voldemort had thought long dead. 

Standing again, Voldemort tried to back away, but Deidra turned around and followed him. "Tom, how can you behave this way, you act like you don't even know me. You don't even know your own mother."

Voldemort stopped dead in his tracks and spun around to face Deidra. "You are not my mother and don't ever say you are."

In a far back corner of her mind Deidra was still Deidra and she knew what she had to do, she had to get Voldemort to use all of his hate raw force on her so that she could counteract it with Jenifer Riddle's love for her son, that would destroy him, if she could just maintain control of her body long enough to do it.

"Tom, Tom please don't make me have to punish you, I don't want to, but you leave my no alternative." She stood facing Voldemort now, he was seithing, just barely able to control himself.

Throwing his arms up in a wild geture he shouted, "YOU"RE NOT MY MOTHER! My mother is dead I KILLED HER!" He yanked out his wand, "fine, fine you're my mother, that just means I'll have to kill you again!" He held his wand in both hands, concentrating very hard, drawing on all the power of his hate to end the life of his mother.

But before he could call up enough power to do anything, Deidra had nocked the wand out of his hand, "Thomas, what do you think you're doing?! That's it, I've had enough!"

This was it, in that far corner of the mind where Deidra still existed, she called up all her strength to order her body to grasp Voldemort by the right forearm.

"Fine! I don't need a wand to finish you off!" Using his right hand, he grasped Deidra by the forearm of the hand that held his. Calling on the power of his hate once more. Once he felt he had enough gathered together, he sent his power out, in what he visualized as something like acid rain, towards Deidra. But when his power reached the part where their arms were joined, it was as though his power had hit a brick wall. 

The massive energy of Jenifer Riddle's love for her only child was enough to hault Voldemort's dark magic dead in it's tracks. What's more, now her power began to advance on him, preparing to suffocate him.

Deidra was sreaming again, the pain she had felt when she joined her soul with Jenifer Riddle's was nothing compared to the agony she was experiencing now. Deep inside of her a fierce battle raged. The Deidra half of the body was desperately trying to harvest and channel the love of the Jenifer half to destroy Voldemort. All the while, the Jenifer half raged to stop the flow and save her son. 

But in the end Deidra used every ounce of control she still had over her body and used it to bend the Jenifer half into submission. Power exploded from her hand that held Voldemort's arm. Son's resentment of mother was no match for mother's love of son. The raw force of Jenifer's love cascaded over Voldemort, suffocating him, eating away at his very soul until there was nothing left. 

Spent, Deidra/Jenifer collapsed on the ground. Next to her was a large chared spot where Voldemort's body would have been. Deidra had used all her control and strenght to force Jenifer to destroy her son. Now she had no control, and as her body slowly began to lose conscienceness, the part that was Deidra slipped deep, deep down into the depts of her mind, so that she could not find her way back. She was trapped in the prison of her own mind. Jenifer Riddle had control of Deidra's body and mind now, and she had no way of fighting it.

###############################^#############################

Both Dumbledore and Severus had tried questioning Lucious several times, but neither was able to get any more information out of him. Severus sat, his back supported by the wall, his head on his knees. Dumbledore sat on the steps of the staircase, his head resting on his hands. Lucious was still held up against the wall and no one had spoken for almost an hour. 

Suddenly Severus stood up and began stalking towards the door. Albus moved and stood in his path, "Severus, where are you going?"

Severus tried to maneuver his way around the older man, but Dumbledore held up his wand to Severus's breast. Sighing in defeat Severus confessed his thought, "This is foolish, we know where Deidra is, it's been over two, maybe three hours since he took her away, who knows what could have happened by now! I can't just sit here any longer, I'm going after them, who knows, maybe I can be of some help to the right side for a change!"

Dumbledore sighed, considering what they should do. At last, after several minutes of silence, he spoke, "you're right Severus, we have waited here idle for too long, someone needs to go after Deidra."

"Right," said Severus as he tried to push past Dumbledore again, but still Dumbledore held him back.

"However, I do not think that you are the best person to go Severus," Albus finished, looking down.

Severus's face dropped, "What?!"

Albus held up his hand for silence, "Severus, we have no idea what you'll meet if you go to find them, further more, you are somewhat at a disadvantage where Deidra is concerned, you love her, and at times I think that my cloud your judgement."

Now Severus was angry again, "And she isn't a weakness for you too Albus, we both love her more than anything else, you're at as much of a disadvantage as I am."

Dumbledore sighed again, he had not wanted to get into an argument with Severus, but he didn't think he should be the one to go. "Yes, I will not deny that if I have any weakness whatsoever, it is Deidra. But I also think that of the two of us, I would be more likely to be able to deal with whatever we may might find along with Deidra and Voldemort, than you. And lastly, I need you to stay here and look for everyone else, I can't sense them anywhere, but for once Lucious was right, there's no way Deidra would have had time to evacuate everyone one the students and staff. My guess is that they're hidden somewhere inside the castle, and Deidra used her magic to shield them."

Severus drew back then. He knew Albus was right, about everything, but that didn't mean he liked it. "Very well," he mumbled.

"Good," said Dumbledore, patting him on the back, then you get started, and I'll be on my way." Severus nodded sullenly and trudged off into the depths of the castle.

Dumbledore turned and went out the front entrance, making his way as quickly as possible to the edge of the grounds. He wanted to be able to apparate to the graveyard as soon as possible. 

********************************^****************************

Meanwhile, Severus was busy trying to think of all the possible places in the castle that could hide roughly five hundred people and eight ghosts. At first he'd looked in all the obvious places, the great hall, the dungeons, etc. He had decided to try the library and was in the process of searching through the shelves when he came across a very old, fraying book laying open in the middle of the row. Stooping over, he picked up the book and began leafing through it. From its content, he could tell it was a highly restricted book. But when he read the title he just dropped the book, MELDINGS, COMBINATIONS, AND BINDINGS, this was a very dangerous book, especially in certain hands. Tucking the book under his arm he left the library to have another little chat with Lucious.

################################^############################

Albus had apparated almost before he'd reach the clearing outside the forest, which was the end of the Hogwarts grounds. He hadn't indicated anything to Severus, or anyone else. But he was utterly petrified right now. His only child, his baby, in the hands of the Dark Lord. For the past few hours' visions of Deidra's mother just before she died had been filling Dumbledore's head. Just before she'd died, Albus's wife had made him swear to always protect their child and see that she did not meet her end like her mother had. For thirty-one years, Albus had kept that promise. He'd protected Deidra, sheltered her, taught her, cared for her, loved her. Now, as found himself among the tombstones of this all too familiar grave yard, he dared to ask himself the question that had been haunting him since they had received Deidra's letter back in London; _were these thirty-one years all for nothing? Shall I fail a second time in protecting the ones I love?_

He walked among the rows of stone, his eyes scanning the area for any possible sign of what had happened. He approached a gigantic oak, and on the other side, he could hear faint sobbing. Albus's heart began to race as he rounded the corner. At first he couldn't see anything, but once he'd past a row of stones he saw first a large chard black spot and next to it was the huddled weeping form of Deidra. He breathed deep with relief and made his way over to her. Kneeling down beside her, he gently touched her shoulder, "Deidra, Deidra darling, it's daddy, are you alright?"

Deidra turned her tear-streaked face to him and brought her hands up to her mouth in horror. She looked from Dumbledore to the spot beside her, then back to Dumbledore again. "What have I done, what have I done to my baby, my Tom, what have I done to my Tom?!"

Dumbledore drew back in shock and fright, this may be his daughter's body, but this was not his daughter. He didn't know how or why this had happened, but he knew as sure as he loved her, that this was not his Deidra. 


	13. Love's Fight

****

Love's Fight

Severus sat on the steps of the grand staircase, toying idly with the ring he'd been carrying in his pocket. He'd given up on looking for the students and talking to Lucius about a half-hour ago. He couldn't figure out for the life of him where they were hiding. One thing Dumbledore had been right about, of all the people he could think of besides Albus, Deidra was the most capable of protecting them, and, just as her father had predicted, she'd done a hell of a job with it. 

He'd also given up on trying to get anymore information out of Lucius. Roughly fifteen minutes into their umpteenth conversation, Lucius had aggravated him so much that, in Dumbledore's absence, he'd finally given into his inner urgings and knocked Lucius unconscious.

So now he just sat there, wallowing in self-pity and regret. Looking at the ring he thought to himself, _if she- WHEN! When she gets back, I'll ask her, it's time, it's time I asked her. I've wasted so much time and lost so much, it's time. _Holding the ring straight up, he examined it and grimaced. Would her finger still fit, it'd been sixteen years after all, and she was just a fifth year then, who knew how much she'd grown since then. 

Severus was growing terribly restless, replacing the ring in his pocket he looked around him. _Where ARE they?! _In frustration he slammed his fist into the stairwell, dislodging a vast amount of ancient dust that made him cough and his eyes water. Violently he rubbed his eyes to try to free them of dust. After several minutes he had succeeded and could see. He returned to watching the front door. And then, as if by his command, the door began to open. 

***********************************^*************************

Dumbledore half-supported, half-dragged the young woman up Hogwarts' steps. All the way she hadn't stopped weeping for her "son." It sickened Albus beyond belief that his daughter should be weeping for the demise of Lord Voldemort, the most cruel, evil, and dark wizard of their time. And he silently vowed to take revenge on Lucius and any other Death Eater he could get his hands on for the terrible crime that had been committed on his only child. Stopping at the doors, Albus steadied Deidra in his arm, and with the other one, pushed the massive doors open. 

Deidra went stiff in her father's arms and she tried to resist as he attempted to lead her across the threshold. Seeing Severus sitting on the staircase, Albus called to him, "Severus, quickly, come and help me get her inside."

Severus, eyes wide with confusion and fear, uneasily got to his feet and rushed over to the pair of people standing in the doorway. When he got to them, he instinctively reached out to pull Deidra to him. But she shrank back, her eyes filled with terror. "Deidra, it's me, what's wrong, tell me what's wrong."

At that moment Deidra wrenched herself free of Albus's grasp and backed away from the two men. Suddenly she shouted with all her might "I AM NOT DEIDRA! MY NAME IS JENIFER, AND I HAVE JUST LOST MY SON!!!!" And with that she crumpled to the floor in a bitter fit of tears.

Severus rounded on Dumbledore, "What is this? What has happened to her? TELL ME!"

The two men stood with the weeping woman between them, each withering at the sight before them. Albus put his head in his hands, his words were muffled, but none the less strong and angry. "I don't KNOW! If I had known, I would have known what to do to fix it, But I DON"T!"

Severus turned around, he couldn't look at the scene before him anymore. He heard Dumbledore's voice behind him, but tried to ignore it. "Have you found anyone yet Severus?"

Clenching his fists, Severus tried to control the anger that was rapidly boiling up inside of him. "No, I have not been able to find anyone."

Albus came up to stand behind him, "I think I know where they are, go down to the dungeons an-"

"I already looked there." Severus growled.

"I know, just do as I say, I think we both may have missed them due to my daughter's spell. Go down to the dungeon. On the wall, the first one on the left, is a portrait of a snake in a cave, pull it aside and see if you find anything. When you find them, have Madam Pomfrey meet us in the hospital wing, I'll stay here with Deidra." Severus nodded dumbly and set off toward the stairs leading down. Albus watched him go, then turned back to the crumpled figure on the floor.

#################################^###########################

Severus shuffled down the stairs, _this is pure madness! _He thought to himself, _what's happening, the last time I turned around, we didn't even know where Voldemort was, now, I just don't know, and I'm through trying to figure it out. _

Without even noticing it, Severus had stopped before the picture Albus had described to him. He'd been walking up and down these halls for almost twenty years, and he had never before actually noticed this painting. It was, as Dumbledore had said, a painting of a snake in a cave. He'd never really thought much of it, after all, most pictures down here featured some sort of snake or another. Now that he was really looking at it for the first time, he noticed that the background of the cave seemed to be illuminated by thousands of eyes, it was very unsettling to look at, and Severus wondered how he'' never noticed this painting before.

About to extend his hand, Severus checked himself, the thought suddenly came to him, Dumbledore had given him no password to make the painting move. He let out an irritated sigh and approached the painting. He'd used up all his patience and then some today. Grasping the frame by its side, Severus simply lifted it off its hook. What was behind the picture, he never would have guessed. In the wall was a large gaping hole, almost as big as the picture itself. 

Severus moved his head closer to examine the entrance. He knew there were many hidden tunnels and rooms in Hogwarts, but he'd never known about this one, which was in fact, barely five yards from his own office. It made perfect sense. Deidra must have known about this particular tunnel, and, when she'd known she wouldn't be able to get the students out in time, had them all hid down here. Then she must have magiced the place for protection and concealment, which would explain why Dumbledore hadn't been able to locate them through his connection with the school.

Gingerly, Severus put a foot inside the gaping hole, testing to see if it was solid. And indeed it was, his foot registered a stone step, and ducking so as to be able to get through, he brought the rest of himself inside the hole. 

It was pitch black inside. Fumbling in his robes, Severus extracted his wand and muttered "Lumos." Carefully, he descended the steps, making sure to hold his wand out in front so he would be able to see any obstacles in time to avoid them. 

As he went deeper and deeper into the darkness, he began to hear voices. After about a hundred feet or so, he saw a light up ahead. As he approached it, the noise grew very loud, and all at once he found himself in some sort of cellar. Students were scattered everywhere, some playing games, others trying to do homework, and at the edges of the room all the teachers stood, alert, wands outstretched. 

Minerva was the first to notice him, and she hurried over. "Severus, what is going on? We've been sitting here for hours, where's Deidra?"

Severus's eyes were scanning the room for madam Pomfrey, he didn't really want to deal with Minerva right now, he just wanted to get back to Deidra. Cutting Minerva's inquiries short he held up his hand and asked "where's madam Pomfrey, Albus needs her to get up to the hospital wing immediately."

Hearing her name, madam Pomfrey trundled over and stood next to Minerva, "professor, your back, what's happened, we haven't seen Deidra since she stuck us in here, and that was hours ago."

Severus was quickly loosing his patience, gesturing to both women he said rather hurriedly, "I'll explain it to you both on the way, but Dumbledore NEEDS madam Pomfrey upstairs, NOW!"

Both women exchanged a look that later Severus would recall as being somewhat reminiscent of Albus's when he saw something in a situation other than what was being told to him. For Severus that was enough, and he turned on his heels, counting on them to follow. 

*********************************^***************************

In the end, Albus had been unable to get Deidra to move on her own, so he'd been forced to carry her up to the hospital wing. She wasn't very heavy, but the sorrow of her situation weighted Dumbledore's shoulders like a thousand pounds. 

As he walked through the halls, he thought he saw a little girl with glowing auburn hair streaming behind her running ahead of them. He shuddered as he remembered all the times he'd seen that very same little girl, running, skipping, and dancing through these halls. For a brief span the dark, murky halls had been illuminated by her presence, and then dimmed by her absence. Now he carried the woman who that little girl had become in his arms, her lost soul dancing gaily around them as they walked back through the path of her past, searching for a way to reunite them. 

When he reached the door of the hospital wing, he turned around to push the door open with his back. Entering the now dark room, he placed Deidra down on a bed just inside the door. She seemed to be totally unaware of him now, and she babbled madly about her little boy, and how he would be coming home from school at any moment.

Dumbledore took a seat in a chair on the opposite side of the room, he sat in the darkness, trying to figure out what he could do.

#################################^###########################

Severus had been hurrying the two women through the halls, calling out a half explanation over his shoulder as he rushed towards the hospital wing. When they got there, they found the door open. Cautiously, the three crossed the threshold into the dark room, unsure of what they would find.

What they did find was Deidra lying in a bed near the door, twittering madly to herself, completely unaffected by their arrival, and Dumbledore sitting across the room from her, his head still buried in his hands. Madam Pomfrey registered the state of both men and took charge immediately. "Minerva, would be so kind as to get some light in here. I can hardly see a thing." 

Then, turning to Dumbledore, she said, "what is the problem headmaster, everyone seems to be fine to me."

Bringing his head out of his hands, Dumbledore gestured weakly with a nod of his head, toward the bed where Deidra lay. Turning around, Madam Pomfrey beheld a young woman sitting up on the bed, idly clasping and unclasping her hands and muttering something about "her baby Tom." The young woman seemed to be totally unaware of anyone else's presence.

"Oh my word Dumbledore, what's happened." Madam Pomfrey was very confused now, this young woman looked like Deidra Dumbledore, whom she had known since the child was days old, and yet, she didn't look like Deidra, something about the eyes spoke of something, someone else.

"That is just it Poppy, I don't know what's wrong, from what I can gather, she seems to think she's Jennifer Riddle, and will not be persuaded to think otherwise." Dumbledore leaned back in his chair, exhausted, anxious, and unsure. "I am at a lose my dear madam, I think this is my daughter, and yet, at the same time, I cannot believe she is, can you help her, or at least determine what has been done to place her in such a state.?"

Madam Pomfrey waked over to where Deidra was sitting, chattering away, totally oblivious to what was being said around her. Tentatively, Poppy reached out her hand to first conduct a general examination. But when she touched Deidra's cheek, the young woman drew back, whispering, "don't touch me, please."

Gently, Madam Pomfrey patted her on the shoulder, "there's nothing to be afraid of dear, I just going to check to see if you are injured in any way, that is, if you will let me?" For a few moments there was total silence, then Deidra nodded her head sadly and submitted to Madam Pomfrey's examination. 

Checking all the normal elements, pulse, all body parts, etc. she found nothing out of the ordinary other than a few light red indents where she appeared to have been restrained. Next she tried some verbal tests, she asked Deidra about memories, people, places, and things, that, under normal circumstances, Deidra would have been able to remember and identify, but she showed no sign of recognition or remembrance to any of them. And when asked about her past, she told, word for word, the story of Jennifer Riddle's life.

After Madam Pomfrey could think of no other ways to test her, she turned around to face Albus, Minerva, and Severus, who had sat and listened quietly all the while she'd been testing. "I don't understand it," she said. "There appears to be no physical or mental damage, yet for the life of me, if I did not know that this was in fact Deidra Dumbledore, I could have sworn she was Jennifer Riddle, she had her memories and everything. I don't understand it, I've never seen anything like this before in my life."

All this time Severus had not said a word, but now he spoke, "Jennifer Riddle, Albus, wasn't she Tom Riddle's mother, the Tom Riddle who became Lord Voldemort."

Albus shook his head sadly, "The very same my dear Severus, the very same."

Now Severus was beginning to form an idea, "and was your daughter not a living expert on raw forces?"

Albus looked at him quizzically, "yes, she was, but what does that have to do wi- You don't think that she,"

"It would explain a great deal of things, including that book I found in the library." 

"what book?" Albus demanded, "what are you talking about Severus."

"Wait a moment and I'll show you." And with that he rushed out the door, leaving everyone in mid-thought.

****************************^********************************

Severus bounded down the stairs to the place where he'd been sitting before Albus had returned, and, sure enough, right next to the stairs was the book he'd found in the library. Quickly, he checked the inside cover to make sure he'd not been mistaken, and raced back up to the hospital wing with it.

##############################^##############################

It hadn't been more than five minutes since Severus had left before he came crashing (he always was one for entrances) through the door again, an old, crumbling book clutched to his chest.

"Here it is," he panted as he handed the book over to Dumbledore. "When I was searching the castle I looked in the library and I found this on the floor in the restricted section, still opened, I thought maybe Malfoy (the elder) had been snooping around, but when I asked him, he said he didn't know anything about it. I figured he was just bluffing, but maybe he really wasn't the person who'd looked in the book, maybe it was Deidra." Bracing his hands on his knees, Severus tried to catch his breath while he waited for Dumbledore to examine the book.

Everyone waited with baited breath as Albus flipped through the pages in silence. Severus stood over his shoulder, reading the chapter titles to himself. Finally when he recognized the one the book had been open to, he called out, "that's it, that's what it was open to when I found it."

Dumbledore read the heading out loud so everyone could hear it, "BINDINGS, BOTH PHYSICAL, MENTAL, AND SPIRITUAL. Good God! You don't think she- She must have, it's the only explanation."

"Albus, what on Earth are you talking about." Minerva had been watching silently from Deidra's bedside. "What did she do? what are BINDINGS?"

Albus ran his hand over his face, "BINDINGS, are when a person combines, their body, their mind, or their spirit, or all of the above, with those of another person, and I am inclined to believe, given the evidence, that that is exactly what my daughter has done to herself." He rose from his seat and came over to sit on the other side of Deidra's bed, she had fallen asleep while they were talking. For a few moments, Albus just sat and watched the gentle rise and fall of her chest, trying to pretend that this was all some horrid mistake, and when she opened her eyes again, they'd be her eyes, and she would be herself.

"So you are suggesting," said Minerva cautiously, "that Deidra bound herself to the mind, body, and spirit of Jennifer Riddle?" She raised her head to get a response from Albus, who only nodded. "But Dumbledore, that's ridiculous, Jennifer Riddle has been dead for years, years Dumbledore! How could Deidra possibly have bound herself to someone who is long dead."

Albus shrugged, "from what I have read in that book Minerva, it does not matter whether the person you are binding yourself to is alive or dead, either way it can be done, and obviously has."

Madam Pomfrey spoke again, unsure if she'd followed the conversation correctly. "But headmaster, why would she want to bind herself to Jennifer Riddle, what good did it do."

"I'll tell you why she would want to do it." Now Severus too walked over to join them, "she wanted to, and did, do it, because it enabled her to kill Voldemort, for once, and for all."

"Bu, bu, but, how?" Minerva stuttered, this whole conversation was becoming very disturbing to her.

This time both men answered at once, "Raw Force." They then exchanged a glance of pure sorrow and regret, and Severus nervously touched his left upper forearm.

"But Dumbledore, raw forces have been illegal since before Deidra was born, what's more, they've been kept very secret, how could she even know about them."

Albus bowed his head, not wanting to look at anyone, "I taught her."

Both women let out a gasp of shock, but said noting more, wanting Dumbledore to continue.

"I was very reluctant to have anyone teach her, or even to send her to Hogwarts, so I tutored her in Defense Against the Dark Arts myself. I wanted her to be prepared for anything. If you face a dark wizard, they're not going to stop and consider whether the curse they're about to use is legal or not. And I don't care how secret the ministry was about it, there were many people who knew about it, and they passed it on. So I wanted my daughter to be prepared to face it, to fight it and, if need be, to use it. Now keep in mind, I didn't teach her exact spells, that's why she would have needed this book, but I did teach her the principles behind raw forces and how they could be used, and what they could be used for."

"But why did she need raw forces to defeat Voldemort, lord knows we've done it enough times without them?" Minerva asked, unsure of what Dumbledore was hinting at.

"She needed them, Minerva, because since Voldemort's rebirth, none of magics and party tricks we've used before of any use. From the very beginning Voldemort has been using raw forces in his magic, through Deidra's extensive studies into the subject, she must have been able to spot. Lord knows I didn't before now. Anyway, Voldemort used the raw force of his hate for a particular person, or group, to destroy them, therefore, to block his magic, and to destroy him someone would have to employ a raw force magic of the opposite kind." Dumbledore stopped for a moment to let what he'd just said sink in.

"Forgive me again headmaster," said Madam Pomfrey, "but what exactly are you saying?"

"I'm saying," said Dumbledore with a sigh, "That because Voldemort was going to use the raw force of his hate for me and my family to kill Deidra, to prevent him, and destroy him, Deidra had to use a raw force of love for him. Now she has no love for him, in fact I think there's only one person in the world that ever did love him. Deidra must have thought the same, and so she bound herself to that person in order to obtain the means of destroying Voldemort, for once and for all."

Now everyone was staring at him, and no one moved a muscle until, finally, Minerva broke the trance with a whisper of "Tom's mother, Jennifer." Dumbledore only nodded again, to sad to speak.

"How can we reverse the spell?" Asked Madam Pomfrey, "I have no previous experience with such spells, and it seems, neither do any of you."

"But," said Severus from his position at the head of Deidra's bed, his voice hopeful. "If she got the spell for binding out of the book, wouldn't it also have a counter or reverse spell in it too." That was enough to lift everyone's heads.

"Yes," Minerva breathed, getting excited, "that book must have some answers." And with that everyone bolted back to the other side of the room where Dumbledore had left the book.

******************************^******************************

Each had taken a turn searching through the entire book, but over an hour later, no one had found any answers. Severus, who'd been the last one looking at the book, threw it aside in despair. Standing up, he paced the length of the room several times, as though he were a tiger trapped in a circus cage. 

Minerva followed him with her eyes for three lengths before she spoke, "Severus, stop, please, it does us no good."

Severus spun to face her, his face suddenly scarlet with rage, "Well what would do us some good, I don't know, do you, tell me and I'll gladly do it, but as far as I can see there isn't anything left to do but sit and wait!" With that he picked up a glass from off the stand of a nearby empty bed and flung it against the opposite wall, causing it to shatter loudly on impact. 

Everyone cautiously looked over at Deidra, who only shifted slightly and went back to sleep. Madam Pomfrey went over to stand by Severus, her face a mixture of concern and anger, "Well that was very productive, wasn't it. You'll do her no good throwing tantrums like a little boy, honestly Severus, I thought you had more man in you than that." 

With that Severus withered to the ground and began to weep. "I don't what I can do, if I thought anything might be of any help to her, I do it in a second, I just feel so helpless, I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do." He sobbed, hugging his knees to his chest like a little boy who'd been cornered. And for a while he rocked himself in silence.

##############################^##############################

Finally, Minerva stood up, turning to Dumbledore, she said, "I don't see much else I can do here right now, so why don't I go start herding the students back to their dormitories?"

Dumbledore looked at her, Minerva could see the faint trail of tears down his face and through his beard, she wished there was some way she could comfort him, but like everyone else right now, she was at a lose as to what to do. "Yes, Minerva, I think that would be a good idea."

Minerva simply nodded and left. After a short while, Madam Pomfrey left too, after hearing of Severus's encounter with Mr. Malfoy, she thought it might be a good idea to check him for a concussion. So it was that Severus and Albus were left alone with Deidra.

Dumbledore walked over and put his hand of Severus's shoulder, "Severus, I know you don't want to hear this, but you have to be strong, Deidra needs you to be strong for her. I know you are suffering, and so am I, but we have to be strong, because she cannot be."

Slowly Severus stood up and wiped his eyes. He had to admit that he did seem like a little boy, throwing things and weeping on the ground because he hadn't gotten his way, but was truly at a lose for what to do now. Turning around he looked at Dumbledore and saw, really for the first time, how much shame and sorrow was in Albus's face. And it hit him, he was not the only who was suffering because of what had happened to Deidra. This was her father standing before him, a man just as helpless as he was, with just as much to loose, and he too felt ashamed, because up until now he'd just been thinking of himself and his own losses. 

Empathetically, he reached out and grasped Albus's arm, "we'll get her back Albus, we'll find a way."

Albus returned his grasp with equal force and nodded, "yes, there has to be a way, there's always a way."

Severus broke the hold to go back to sit on Deidra's bed. Gently, he took her limp hand in both of his own and stroked it. "Come on my love, show me a way I can reach you, I know you're in there, help me find you." He concentrated fiercely on Deidra's closed eyes, searching for something with which he could draw her out. 

Dumbledore stood at the edge of the bed, also concentrating, but giving Severus his space.

********************************^****************************

All Deidra could see was darkness. She thought she heard familiar voices and tried to find the source, but each time she moved, she met resistance. She was very frightened and she wanted Severus, or her father, or both, she just didn't want to be alone in the dark like this. Deidra had never liked the dark.

#################################^###########################

Severus kept talking to Deidra, just as if she were simply listening to him. He told her about how much he'd hated leaving her. He told her about the Death Eater meeting he'd had to attend, and how it'd made him so thankful that he had truly left that behind and that he had gotten her back. He talked about how afraid he'd been when they'd come back to Hogwarts and found her gone. And he told her how much fun it'd been to finally give Malfoy what he deserved, (at this part Dumbledore chuckled lightly, he'd caught a glimpse of Malfoy when he'd first returned with Deidra, and whatever Severus had done had sure left a mark).

Then Severus got an idea, he shifted Deidra's hand so it rested on the place where his dark mark had been, the place where her hand had rested, only days ago. He paused at that thought, it had only been a few days ago, to him it felt like months, months from that happy moment of love and reunion, months from there to here, when they were farther apart than they'd ever been. 

He placed her hand over the red blotch that was all that was left of his dark legacy. De put more force into his words now, he would do whatever it took to call her out, call her back, even if he had to use his own life force to do it. "Remember this love, remember how I said I was marked for life and you changed it, you changed it with you love. You've changed my entire life with your love. You made me want to be a better person, and when I went astray, it was my thoughts and longings for you that brought me back. I would probably still be a Death Eater if it hadn't been for you. When you left I realized for the first time, how evil the Dark Lord and his cause truly were. You made me realize what was most important to me, the people I care about, you, your father, and all the people who've suffered because fools like me were taken in by the attractiveness of evil. And then, when I thought my life was ruined, that I'd be ridiculed and scorned for the rest of my life, you came back, and you forgave me. But I'm lost again, and I need you to help me, I need you to come back to me Deidra, I need you, I need you, please, please, please." Severus still held her arm over his as he cried, his tears dropped on her hand and fell down the length of her arm.

********************************^****************************

Now Deidra was sure it was Severus's voice that she heard, she could never mistake that deep rumbling sound, it was imprinted in her mind for eternity, and she heard it now. Gathering all her strength, she fought the resistance that met her on all sides. His voice was getting closer, if she could just get to it, if she could just fight. Again and again, she threw herself at the invisible walls that surrounded her. Each time she hit, she felt less and less resistance, _got to keep trying, got to get through, get to Severus, got to get to Severus. _

#################################^###########################

As Deidra began to regain consciousness her fingers ran lightly over Severus's arm. Severus's breath caught, he remembered that first night, that night when she'd held his arm in hers, her power coursing through his very veins as she erased his horrible past, burned it away with her love. 

Now, as her fingers moved over that very same spot, he tried to recall that feeling, the feeling of her love channeling through him, and when he found that feeling, he held on to it, pull at it with all his might. For that feeling, that pulsation of love, was Deidra through and through and he used all the strength of his magic to pull it to him. To break his love away from this other person.

*******************************^*****************************

Deidra felt like a tiny string that was attached to her was being pulled, all at once, she knew, and didn't know, what was going on, but she did know that she should go with this pull. Focusing on where it was coming from, she added her own push to the pull, and finally, she felt a give in the walls of her prison. It felt as though she was being squeezed through a tiny hole, but she didn't fight, because she knew, on the other side of this hole, was freedom. 

################################^############################

A pillar of golden light exploded from Deidra's body, reaching infinitely high. Albus was forced to back away and shield his eyes from the light. Severus, however was not so affected because his eyes were blurred from his tears anyway. Grasping Deidra's arm with both of his own, he concentrated on keeping that his hold on his link to Deidra. He had to keep her with him, he could not let her fly from him a third time. This was what he'd promised himself, this time he would do it right, this time he would be the man she thought he was.

A single high pitched scream that sounded something like "To- Verus." Escaped Deidra's lips before everything fell dark and silent. 

*******************************^*****************************

Albus was the first to gather his wits, scrabbling to his feet and fumbling for his wand in the darkness. Once he got it in hand, he muttered "Lumos" and went over to the bed to see what had happened. 

What he found was Severus, seemingly frozen in place, both his hands clutching Deidra's arm. And Deidra sitting upright and twitching slightly. "Are you alright?" Albus asked in a worried voice.

But Deidra didn't seem to hear him. Her eyes were transfixed on Severus. Slowly, she brought her other hand over to his face, and ran her fingers along his forehead, cheeks, and mouth. She did this for several minutes, as if she were trying to recall something through her touch. Albus could see now that Severus's eyes were open and that he appeared fine, just to frightened to move. 

Then there was a hoarse whisper of, "Severus, Severus." And she broke into complete sobs. Severus was out of his trance in a moment and had Deidra locked in the safety of the circle of his arms. She didn't fight this time, simply melted into his shoulder, clutching him tightly.

Severus pulled her head up just long enough to look into her eyes, "it's you, it really is you." He buried his face in her hair, stroking her back. 

They stayed like that for several minutes, just holding each other and rocking slightly. After awhile, Severus tilted his head so that his mouth was right next to Deidra's ear, and he whispered, "you know, you're a hard woman to hold on to, I think I'll have to get you a leash so you don't keep wandering off."

Deidra pulled out of his arms abruptly, she looked at his face, then began to laugh. This got Severus laughing too, as well as Albus. But because she'd been crying so fiercely, her laugh was an extremely wet one, and Severus had to offer her his sleeve to mop her face. 

After they'd calmed down a bit, Severus shifted to reach into his pocket. Carefully, making sure it was concealed in his fist, he pulled out his ring, he'd waited sixteen years for this. Deidra looked down and saw his hand coming out of his pocket, balled in a fist. "What's that?" She asked, still trying to rid her face of tears.

"It's something, for you." He said, feeling very unsure about this, he hadn't figured out how he would ask her when he first got the notion sixteen years ago, and he still didn't know. "We, we, well, I figured, the only way I could get to keep you for more than a day at a time, would be, to ask you to stay with me forever." And with that he opened his fist to reveal the gold ring with its perfect ruby and diamonds.

Deidra gasped as she reached out and slowly examined the ring, finally taking it out of Severus's up turned palm. Without a moment's hesitation she slipped it on her left ring finger, it fit perfectly.

Severus paled instantly in shock, "Yo, yo, you mean you will."

"What?" said Deidra, sounding playful now, "marry you, yes, I suppose so."

Severus sneered, what was that _she supposed she'd marry him._

But his thoughts were interrupted when Deidra said, "And if I'm to be your wife, there'll be no more of that." And with that she slipped her hand behind the nap of his neck, and pulled him to her, sealing his protests with a passionate kiss. 


	14. Epilogue: An Explanation & a Promise

****

Epilogue: An Explanation & a Promise

Deidra rolled over on to her stomach in bed. Her left hand fell on one of the pillows next to her. She watched as the precious stones of her ring caught in the first rays on dawn and made beautiful rainbows on the wall. She could never stop looking at that ring, it fascinated her. s it was such a small thing, and yet it had such an immense meaning. 

It meant that she was no longer alone, and never would be again. It meant that from now one she would have someone to share all her joys and burdens with. It meant that the last sixteen years of waiting and resisting had not been in vain. It meant that she possessed the greatest gift that any one could offer, unwavering, eternal love. And it meant that the man lying beside her would do so for the rest of her life.

With that thought, she turned her attention to the form huddled in sleep next to her. His face was slightly upturned, and his arms lay limp at his sides. Gently, Deidra extended a finger and traced the line of his arm. Up, past his wrist, past his elbow, along his shoulder, up the curve of his neck, down his jaw line, to end tracing his pale, slightly parted lips. In response to her touch Severus shifted slightly in his sleep, and Deidra quickly withdrew her finger, not wanting to wake him just yet.

But it was too late, he'd already begun to stir, and even before she could completely retract her hand he'd risen and caught it in his own. "So," he whispered huskily, "now it is you who watch over me."

Deidra smiled gently and extracted her captured hand to run it along his cheek. While she did this, he closed his eyes, savoring the touch of her hand against his skin. Shrewdly, he snaked his hand around her waist and drew her to him. But just before he could cover her lips with his, she put her hand in the way.

"We have to be careful you know, I'm engaged to be married, and my fiancée is very strict with me." She teased, pulling back seductively.

"Well," Severus said, pulling her back to him, "I'm an old family friend, so I'm sure he won't mind me, kissing the bride." And before she had a chance to toy with him further, he'd silenced her mouth with his.

Carefully, he fell back on the pillows, pulling her with him. When they finally broke the kiss, she laid her head on his shoulder and rested her hand on his chest. Playfully, he picked up the hand and examined it carefully as thought he was a jeweler. "My, my, my Ms. Dumbledore, where ever did you get such an ornate ring?"

"Well," she began, tossing her hair off her shoulders, letting it brush Severus's arm. "This guy I know gave it to me, but I don't know if I'll keep it, it looks a little strange to me." She pulled her hand away and examined it herself.

"Do you know what it mean?" His voice was serious now.

"No, what does it mean my love?" She asked, resettling herself against him.

"Well," he took her hand in his again, and held it so the back faced them. Using the pointer and middle finger of his other hand he tapped the diamonds. "These are two people." Deidra nodded in reply. "And this," he said, indicating the ruby in the center, "is one heart. Two people, one heart."

Shifting so she was face to face with him, Deidra breathed, "that's us, two people, one heart."

Severus nodded solemnly. "I'm just glad it still fits, how embarrassing that would have been."

Deidra cocked her head in curiosity, "still fits, how long have you had this?"

"Um, let's see," he counted on his fingers, mumbling random dates to himself, "fourteen, fifteen, six-, seventeen years."

"SEVENTEEN YEARS!" Her voice was quiet, but full of shock.

"Yes, seventeen years, I picked it up a week before you left. I'd planned to ask you that very day, but things just kept going wrong, I don't know what happened."

Deidra covered her face with her hands. "Boy, we've really bungled this whole thing up, haven't we Severus?!" She muttered, her voice stifled by her hands.

Severus smiled kindly at the sight his love was making, then lovingly pulled her hands away and tilting her chin so she was looking straight into his eyes. "Yes, we made quite a few mistakes in our past, but we got a second chance. We're very lucky."

"Yes," she said, taking his hand and kissing the palm. "Let's promise each other right now, that we'll do our best to not screw up again. Alright?"

Severus smiled at her, "Alright."

*********************************^***************************

The End!


End file.
